Can't cope

[Catbrian]

Thinking of you, willows

[willows]

I had the day off to care for my daughter yesterday but it is back to work today and she is going off to her dad's house. Feeling very anxious about going to work after Mondays meeting with my manager. Everything seems very overwhelming at the moment.

[Buttercup]

I hope it goes well  %^%

[dave208]

Hi Willows keep fighting hope all goes well with you  *()

[Sweetpea]

I hope it goes well for you Willows %^%. S x x x x

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[willows]

Not a great day at work. Feel like I am losing control of everything.

[Catbrian]

I admire your strength being able to go to work in the first place, willows, especially since I know how difficult things have been for you lately.

I hope it goes well

[Michael Frankum]

I hope that today is a bit easier for you.  *() How is your daughter today? Best wishes.

[willows]

My daughter is recovering well which is good. Not been a great week for though. I had an appointment with my psychiatrist today and I really wanted to be able to say to him that I have begun to feel better but I don't think I have. I have spent the week overreacting to everything, feeling angry and frustrated and breaking down in tears. I have fought to stay at work and to be able to do my job and I have finally had the all clear from my foot consultant that I can start to return to foot patrol at work which is what I have been desperate to do for 5 months and now he has said I can I feel totally overwhelmed at the prospect of getting out and about and dealing with incidents. Because of my mental health I will have to be accompanied by another colleague when I am on patrol but I still feel very anxious tonight as tomorrow will be my first day back out ( couple of hours really as I have to have a gradual return to foot patrol). Why am I now feeling so anxious about something I have been wanting to get back to for so long!?! It just doesn't make sense. What if I can't hold it together in public? What if I can't think clearly enough to deal with the public? I could potentially let so many people down 

[Michael Frankum]

Good luck for tomorrow. You seem very aware of potential problems, but whenever you have been worried before, you seem to have managed the situations perfectly well. You have had so much on your mind. You seem to be a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for. Trust yourself. You can do it. Best wishes always. Michael  %^%

[Sweetpea]

So glad to hear your daughter is recovering well, this must have been such a worry for you. I do hope work was ok for you. S x x x x

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[bookletters]

Willows, you may not feel you are getting better but from your posts, I am seeing a difference between your levels of total desperation to writing longer posts, talking about your daughter, telling us how you feel etc. Remember, when we get better, other people often see it before us :)

[willows]

Really struggled being out and about again. My foot is definitely not as improved as I thought it was and have been in pain for the last couple of evenings and my mood has sunk lower and lower. I don't want to give in to the pain and find myself back in the office.....I have also been feeling incredibly anxious when out and about  and am struggling to engage with the public as is should be able to do. Feeling like a hopeless waste of space and thinking I should just give up and accept the inevitable.

[Zaf]

Its disappointing when we think something has improved more than it actually has, thinking of you xxxx

[bookletters]

You will get there willows, we're all here for you xxxx