I really could lol, but its something I think I will have to learn to cope with, perhaps parcel up and keep very strictly in its place and not let it affect my other bits of life, I used to be able to do that when working for other people so now I need to do it for myself.
I think Ive found a solution to the tea light problem, you can buy electric burners (no tea light so I guess just an element under a ceramic base thing), I have ordered one and will see how that works. In the meantime I'm using the oil on my wrists before I go to bed and sniff it when I need to, so far I have slept slightly better and when I have woken I have managed to get back to sleep which up till now I havent been able to, not ideal but an improvement!
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That sounds positive Zaf what a cool solution! Hope it works that would be so great!
Have you ever thought about going part time? You sound like you are able to take some hours off here and there for meditation which is excellent and I'm glad you are tending to your needs. But have you ever thought about making it official? Think about how it would feel to know that you could pretty much halve your hours! You will be amazed what simply 'gets done' in your absence. When people are absent people step up because they have to. I have been slacking a bit at work recently, because I couldn't give a toot actually! and I can't concentrate long enough to yawn, and nothing has exploded! Some paperwork rubbish might be a bit late, but no one gives a &$%+! On the other end they are so used to things being late that one goody twoshoes like me always making sure everything is on time is a pleasant surprise yes, but late is the norm so makes no difference if I join in actually! Never lived like this before, and it doesn't suit me and I don't intend it to last forever, but it's been a bit of an eye opener that one can just think 'sod it', and the world as I know it does not stop turning and we don't go under! the mental perspective of 'if I haven't got it done it can wait' is IMMENSE!! You MUST try it!
I INSIST you go part time!
I think the Butterfly would approve!
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I tried going part time about 14 months ago, got someone part time in the office etc but she was an absolute disaster and I ended up working all hours to put things right once we discovered she had made a total mess of things and covered it all up - so of course I went back to working longer than full time in the end
Other attempts at getting other people to do things have been a similar disaster, gave someone the job of sorting out the CHAS renewal form a month ago, checked last week how it was going to find he had been 'too busy' and now the deadline is looming I'll have to sort it myself as its a very important accreditation.
I have every determination to officially have every afternoon off but need to find a way of easily checking up that things have been done or are being progressed satisfactorily - the amount of paperwork and H&S stuff these days is enough to drown a small business, for instance for an insurance company survey on a boiler (sort of like a MOT for boilers) we have to submit two method statements (4 pages x 2), various standard risk assessments (usually around 6-8 pages), signature forms, an on-site risk assessment - someone was supposed to be in charge of making sure every job had its attendent paperwork, it worked well for a little while then the system collapsed - I know I cant do everything myself but some sort of system is definitely needed to make sure things that need to be done are done.....any suggestions very welcome!
the butterfly will emerge, even if I have to jump out of that aircraft without a parachute sometime in the not too distant future!
