And now in hindsight of the above post I feel very.... like my problems aren't as 'real' as some of yours

I don't have problems in my relationship generally, I've had no massive event happen in my life to cause this depression.... I just feel like I'm whinging on and like I
should just 'pull myself together'
My depression was caused by just... having too much going on and feeling as though I couldnt cope and yet still forcing myself to cope and keep everyone else happy at the same time. But that was over a year ago!! Surely I should just be taking a deep breath and saying 'Right! I have nothing to be sad about - I have a home, friends, a wonderful boyfriend!! START LIVING AGAIN!!'

But I always feel like there is something holding me back... why can I not go outside on my own, why am I finding it so scary?? Is it just simply because I have just programmed myself into this way of thinking because its 'easier' to stay in my nice little house and do things that I generally like??

I don't know...
I'm sorry if some of my posts come across as self absorbed and I'm sure a lot of you that know about the whole Peter situation are probably thinking 'Just forget him - move on, stop torturing yourself over a guy that was obiously not good for you!!' (I'm sure its what Chris thinks and also my best friend (who is a girl this time!) )