How are you feeling today?

[Zaf]

I think its pretty usual with depression Alstare, like Depina said, try to  remember the good bits

[Alstare1974]

Thanks. I've had it quite a few times before just not so immediate. I guess I just wanted to get it off my chest. Don't know what to do about my feelings and I wonder if I'm too much of a mess to start thinking about getting involved with someone.

[cornish]

the crash is horrible   know exactly how you feel on that one

if you have the slightest doubt about it then just stay as friends until your completely ready

[cornish]

Ok I'm getting worried about being self destructive, I have work in 5 hours, I haven't eaten for a few days and my Si keeps getting worse, went a lot deeper than normal earlier and it won't stop bleeding, how do I explain this much blood everywhere, I'm scrubbing like mad to clean up and I'm still leaking.  

* edit

Meant bleeding, not leaking lol.  Umm not lol but I can see the funny side,  grr I have a strange sense of humour

[Alstare1974]

Hey Cornish

Only just seen this post. How are you doing today?

[smirfy21]

hey Cornish post something so we know you are ok and didn't bleed to death please. gawwwwd I hope your ok and I am sorry I didn't see this post earlier we could of helped although I know how easy it is to SH.

smirfy

[cornish]

cleaned up ok i think in the end, didnt get any sleep at all and ive just got home from work. im ok, well physically i am anyway, except a chunk of me missing 

[cornish]

oh and dental floss makes good diy stitches

[Depina]

Thinking of you Cornish Please take care XX

Alistair- yes the crash is SO upsetting, I hate it  hope it doesn't last long XX

[Alstare1974]

oh and dental floss makes good diy stitches

I assume you dont mean with a needle :-s

[cornish]

oh and dental floss makes good diy stitches

I assume you dont mean with a needle :-s

umm well actually i do, im a bit anti hospital n stuff, i prefer diy self fixing.
got a bit of a diy first aid kit (it does have a normal kit with it and a sewing kit ) that well isn't any where close to a normal one, its got super glue and electrical tape in it, oh n i found out from my gp that electrical tape is poisonous.  got a bottle of dettol in there too, just pour it on everything :) multi tool thingey, safety pin, a lighter, sterilizing / cauterize wounds n stuff. cling film, bailer twine (gotta have that im cornish :p ) .
its by my gun and weird survival kit. gotta love paranoia, i live near a large bridge thats one of the main ways into cornwall and i know i could take it out within an hour. just in case we get invaded, there not having cornwall

[Alstare1974]

Wow. I couldn't do that

[cornish]

its not easy till your used to it, suppose it comes from a life of being very accident prone and having a fear of hospitals

[Alstare1974]

I've had urges to sh I just can't bring myself to do it cos I'm a bit freaked out by needles and sharp things. Plus I have a tattoo where I'd do it and I don't want to ruin it.

[cornish]

si is not good, its a terrible habit and i think in the long run makes me feel worse, you will ruin your body and be left with reminders forever, all i have is regret

i dont really count fixing my self up or stitching as si but they bloody hurt so i suppose they are