Holykimura thanks very much for your supportive advice. How true. It is important that I remember all the blessings in my life. I have got stuck in a rut of 'I'm nothing without her' and I'm ashamed that I can't get out of it. All those things you have said I already know and I feel just awful for not being able to charge myself with those positive thoughts, but, as always, you have said the right thing at the right time. However much I can not do it for myself, there is always some one here who does it for me right when I need it. Thank you. I feel ashamed and weak that I can not get there for myself faster. I am not a wallower, and I have been through break ups before and successfully come out the other side. But I feel that I have never broken up with the absolute love of my life, the one I was supposed to be with forever, before and the utter disaster of it all floods my mind like the first time 20 times a day. I am aware that I sound really rather ridiculous, and I try not to say too much becuase, as I've said before, I am sure there are break up sites for this kind of stuff, it;s not really appropriate here. but thank you for your kind words. They are wise ideed.
How are you coping at work at the moment? Does it help at all to know that after a certain amount of weeks a break will always be coming, or do you have to work through those anyway? How is your partner coping with her own depression and medication? You are both going through a difficult time together, with mutual understanding of the illness I can't imagine whether that makes things easier or harder? You sound a little more positive in your posts.