My incredibly messed up story - very long, doubt anyone will read

[nocaph]

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[Catbrian]

I suffer from mania, apparently, due to Bi-polar.  I also liken it to amphetamines without the euphoria.  Last week I spent a whole week surviving on 3hrs sleep.  I wanted to do everything.  Unfortunately, what goes up must come down.  During these times, I can also hear voices, but most usually someone shouting my name or knocking on the door.

I hope your MRI scan went ok today

[nocaph]

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[captainkeefy]

I don't think it's mania then. I don't experience such quite highs. Just feel real good about myself for a while before things start crashing down around me. It's happened a few times to me now and I've spotted a pattern to it so hopefully now I can defend myself against it. or cushion the blow at least.

Will you being getting your test results tomorrow or will you have to wait for them?

[nocaph]

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[captainkeefy]

I don't think it's weird that you hope to find something major and be informed of this straight away. I'm guessing that the main reason why you feel like this is so that you can prove the doubters wrong and finally get the help and support you have been after all along. I guess why you say that you would feel relief and maybe suicidal if your tests come back clear. I guess you will feel really down if you get the all clear, a sense of despair that this is going to carry on.

   

[nocaph]

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[Sweetpea]

I have also had an MRI and I know how scary it is. I just hope you do not have to wait to long for the results. S x x x x

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[nocaph]

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[bookletters]

Nocaph, don't feel bad this has happened, untreated or ineffectively treated depression would lead you to having to go home because you get a wave of low mood. Please try not to worry about it, once you have an effective treatment this won't be happening and you'll be able to get on with your life xx

[Sweetpea]

I totally agree - some people have no idea of how to talk/treat someone. I am sorry you had to go through this. S x x x x

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[captainkeefy]

I used to know lots of guys who had personality problems and got picked on in school. Once they left they got into the gym and then started experimenting with steroids. They are all bully beef cakes now and work on the doors. This is when I realized doormen where mostly picked on at school so they get a job where they can join up with other meat balls and target people who are quiet and who don't express themselves in a confident way.

Don't take it personally I know a few of these people and a lot of them suffer from strokes and heart attacks. Let them have their little fun because secretly they are really unhappy and insecure themselves. Plus when all that testosterone is finished being used there will only be estrogen left and you know what happens to a mans body when its flooded with estrogen 

[nocaph]

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[nocaph]

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[captainkeefy]

"No you can't have a chest X-ray, talk to the psychiatrist instead". 

That is the last straw, I'm changing my GP tomorrow... no one could possibly do more harm than he's doing/has done.  He was being so aggressive towards me that I didn't even get a chance to tell him that I'm bleeding from my digestive tract.  Oh and then my dad started screaming at me as usual and said "If you're gonna kill yourself then just do it" in response to me saying I felt suicidal.

Hate everything.

Why do you need to speak to your psychiatrist?