Really think its time for medication :(

[CharleysAngel']

She is really lovely, and I can honestly say she is the only person that I completely trust ( apart from you guys here). Its still going to be hard to tell her everything though xx

[Sweetpea]

It will be hard but you are a strong girl and you know its the right thing to do %^%. I am sure you will feel relief when you have said it. S x x x x

[CharleysAngel']

I hope so Shaz, that and probably total blind panic about what she is going to do next xx

[Sweetpea]

I am sure she will take things slowly and at your pace %^%. S x x x x

[SteveW]

I read your posts and your mention of stomach aches worried me. Ibuprofen is an NSAID drug and the whole group are known for their tendency to cause stomach ulcers. The first signs of this would be heartburn and stomach pains. Trust me you do not want to develop a stomach ulcer at your age. I was once in hospital and the guy in the next bed had a stomach ulcer that had started to bleed and he  did not have an easy time.

If you are still under 18 your GP should not prescribe you anti-depressants. There is a global warning about this because they have a demonstrable tendency to increase suicidal thoughts and actions in young people. There is also not much evidence that they do much good in very young people  anyway.

I am fully with everything Stevie has said about the addictiveness of anything containing Codeine. Codeine is not a good painkiller except for short term use. It will give you constipation in the medium term which is another problem you don’t need.

I am sorry that you do not get on with your counsellor but it is in this field that your answers will ultimately have to come. If your counsellor hasn’t built up a working relationship with you she is failing and should be made aware of this so she can either change her approach or seek some alternative for you.

[CharleysAngel']

Thanks stevewellam x

I really hope its not a stomach ulcer, the pain I get is in my lower tummy and not upper where the stomach is.

It is highly unlikely that my doctor will prescribe me medication anyway. When things were really bad last time, and I did tell her then that I thought about self harm, not that I had actually done it and I sometimes think about suicide, she said that she wasn't allowed to give me anything, only CAMHS could do that. Only now I found out that that is a lie because she gave this other girl meds who is the same age as me, I know this because her mum is good friends with mine. I found this very frustrating because I have just been left to suffer for such a long time and everyone just seems to pass the buck. I feel like no one wants to help me and they just hope that the next person will. Its not fair, she got meds, and a choice of psychiatrists and different types of therapy, I didn't get any of that. Her case wasn't really any different from mine either, she never attempted suicide and she never self harmed.

I don't take the codiene very often, and when I do I never take it for longer than three days because it says not to on the packet. I'm not addicted to it, I just like to have it there incase I need it.

I don't trust the counsellor at all and she isn't the right person to be dealing with the more serious issues I have here. My deputy head told me that when he called me in to chat about the letter the school had got from the doctors. He told me she was not eqipped to deal with depression and I probably needed something else. This was before the CAMHS assessment where I had to lie and make everything look as ok as possible because everyone else seemed to have forgotten the meaning of confidentiality.

[Got]

I think you should follow Steve Wellams' advice very closely. Think about what he said about the higher rate of suicidal thinking when young people begin anti depressant treatment. I myself once experienced a period of constant suicidal thinking as soon as my medication was increased, it was unpleasant for both me and those around me. You don't want to be in that situation at all.

You want medication because you want to feel better. This is understandable. But you are not receiving adequate counseling. The lady you are seeing isn't equipped to deal with your issues and she is very probably under qualified to deal with anything other than people who feel a bit upset. Like Steve Wellam said, answers lie within therapy, and adequate counseling may really help you. Going down the medication route carries risks. If you go down the CAHMS route, you can get therapy from a qualified therapist.....so I think that is what you should do.

Your GP suggests it, I suggest it, and Steve Wellam has said that you need adequate counselling. If therapy reveals that your condition is serious enough to warrant medication at your age, then this should be done by a psychiatrist at the CAHMS and you will be closely monitored.

I agree that the confidentiallity is an issue to you and it is causing you concern. However, your health is at stake here, and that has paramount importance, so I think that you should go back to the CAHMS, tell the whole truth, and that way you will get better faster. It seems like if you don't do this things are just going to be dragged out for longer and longer.

Take care,

Steve