Hi everybody. I'm new to this forum so I thought I'd post this and introduce myself I suppose. I'm 18 and hopefully I'm going to university in September. I joined because I was diagnosed with moderate depression a few months ago and I thought it would help me if I could see that other people are in the same situation as me while I wait to get counselling. I'm hoping I may gain some comfort from realising that. I've been depressed for about 10 months now and I only got diagnosed in March of this year because I was too scared to aproach anyone about my feelings and, because I thought it was a normal teenage thing to feel so miserable all the time. I don't feel like I can talk to my parents or my boyfriend of nearly three years about it because they just don't understand. Its as if I'm the only person in the world who understands, even though I know deep down that I'm not.
I don't really sleep in the nights and find it really difficult to get out of bed in the morning because I'm so tired. I often find myself falling asleep in the middle of the day because I'm so physically and mentally drained. On top of that, I really dispise myself and my image which I never used to do. I used to be quite confident and bubbly but I'm not anymore. I don't really eat alot so I can loose weight to try and look better but everytime I loose a little weight, I gain it back. Probably with intrest. I constantly feel guilty for my mistakes that I made years ago and find myself looking backwards when I used to be happier.
I'm a person who is a perfectionist and so, I can't take any critism without getting upset and crying which I tend to do a lot anyway. To avoid critism and arguments, I lock myself away and I don't spend much time with my friends and family anymore. I don't really like being in public. It makes me edgy and nervous.
I'm sorry to bother everyone with this but I hope you can all help me feel better and I can do the same for you when I'm in a better state of mind.