How are you feeling today?

[Lol]

Smirfy are you ok today? In answer to your question I am a medical professional but I am not a doctor or a shrink and I wouldn't be able to answer your questions even if I was. You must seek your own medical help and confide in your own doctors who know you and your medical history. I can only help you as much as anyone can on here. I hope you managed to achieve relief from your distressing symptoms. Please let us know you're ok and how you got on if you can.

[Lol]

I have lost all strength again today. Weekends are so difficult. I have to get through today. Have planned things to do but have anxiety 5/10 and am battling with myself to do them or sit in tears. I know I need to get out but just the thought of getting in the car to go brings tears to my eyes because I will be on my own. Sundays are family days and to be on my own is so sad. Even if I'm doing things and with people I still feel on my own without my sweetheart beside me. Today is not a good day. 

[Zaf]

Hang in there lol, you are a tower of strenght for so many of us in here I wish I could help more.

One or two of the questions you have asked about relationships made me think a lot and examine my own feelings recently, i'm not sure if this helps at all, and I certainly hope it doesnt have a negative effect, but this morning I realised during some stages of my depression and partial recovery I feel very negative towards my husband, sometimes to the point of wanting to end our relationship - even though deep down I know how much he cares and supports me immensely when I'm ill.  I do hope so very much you get things sorted  &*(

[Lol]

Thanks Zaf, do these negative feelings have a sound foundation? Are there real and actual problems that you are feeling negatively about and want to end your relationship over?

[Zaf]

At the time they do seem very real and justified but when I'm feeling less depressed I realise how wrong I have been, much of the time I seem to blow tiny things out of all proportion when I'm feeling like that and feel I'd be better off on my own, but when the depression subsides the negative feelings about our relationship gradually go, i'm pretty sure in proportion to how depressed I am

I wonder if its simply an avoidance thing like the agorophobia I sometimes suffer from.

[Lol]

This is sounding so familiar. She's sure that it is problems in our relationship and NOT depression. But when you question her as to what the problems are they are small, adjustable, workable things that just aren't that big a problem at all. Then that makes me paranoid because it feels like there must be somthing else that she's not telling me because that simply can't be it! I start to think that she has been suppressing massive problems for years and not telling me about them and even when I ask her this outright she says no - then I think they must be SO big she's CAN'T tell me - she must be too scared and it's best left unsaid. Then I think she must have found some one else and is too afraid to tell me! But I know she hasn't. It is so confusing! How long can these particular periods last for you?

[Tinkerbell]

Crap, I feel like I have no fight left in me.

[Zaf]

I'm not really sure lol, its only very recently I've realised it happens, if at some time I can give you an answer I will, I do knw it comes and goes to a certain extent, that may coincide with the 'normal' fluctuations we experience with depression but I'm not entirely sure

Sorry to hear that Tinkerbell

Today I am feeling a touch more positive again, I've probably overdone it a wee bit this morning so I'm now behaving myself by resting, very frustrating but necessary....

[Lol]

Thanks Zaf. What you have managed to say has been very insightful to me and I feel a little better than I did at first. Think my anxiety is now 4/10 Thanks very much. I may venture out now without quite such a potential to burst into tears!   :)

Tinkerbell I'm sorry you're feeing this way, is there something specific you would like to share?

Zaf I'm so please you are feeling more positive and have got some things done even if it was a little too much. I bet that felt great!  :) Well done for resting now, and if you feel slightly less positive tomorrow you know that there is a reason so nothing to worry about. Feet up, watch a flim, have something nice to eat if you can and don't lift a finger.

[Depina]

Hi
Trying to type this quick as he is outside at the moment,sorry about your relationships, mine is similar, I just can't relax on here and I would love to read all that you have written, but he gets so annoyed, then things go downhill! "£"

Just to say that Zaf and Lol, and others on here - your advice,kindness and love have helped me understand a lot more, thanks very much for the time you take to help people and the good advice you give--even though you have your own problems.

Hoping things get sorted for you very soon- relationships can be so complex can't they and when you are feeling depressed everything seems magnified.
Sending hugs *(*

[Zaf]

I'm glad I've helped a little lol, if I get any more insights into how my relationship varies/suffers in relationship to the depression I'll post and let you know.

I do feel pleased that I am feeling a touch more positive :)  I at last realise when I feel bad I need to rest, taking Friday off work and being extra sensible yesterday has paid dividends, I think I'll now go and have a bit of a nap before I start feeling the need to do something!

[Depina]

WELL DONE !!
  XX

[Lol]

Depina thank you. I'm so sorry to keep hearing just how against this sight your husband is. What is the reason for this?

Depina you bring a lot of help to this site also. Everyone's input, insight, stories - horror or otherwise - are incredibly important and changing lives and moods minute by minute.

Zaf - You have got the most incredible handle on your illness! Keep your friends close and you enemies closer! How true! You need to get to know this selfish son of a in order to out fox it! You are out foxing depression! ~You go girl 

[smirfy21]

Just wanted to thank everyone for their support last night. I think I must have either passed out or fallen asleep on the bathroom floor last night because that is where I woke up feeling pretty strange. I have spent the day just crashed out on the couch today and Im glad I did because I feel better for doing so.
I don't know what last night was all about but I have an appointment with my GP in the morning so I am going to see what he makes of it and see if he thinks I need to change my meds, I also have my weekly bulimia clinic so I am hoping to get some more support with my condition.
anyways night all and thanks for listening to me and not judging me or my actions.
smirfy :)

[Alstare1974]

Glad you're ok smirfy.