How are you feeling today?

[Alstare1974]

Mum went to doctors today. Was diagnosed with depression. I feel so guilty and responsible. I know there are other reasons too but still feel like I am main reason. Feel so guilty.

[smirfy21]

please don't feel guilty it is never easy when the people close to you are diagnosed with depression, your mum would not want you to feel guilty.

try and support each other as much as possible, you know from experiance how it feels and how scary it can be so just let her know you are there for her.

after all she is you mother and she loves you

smirfy

[smirfy21]

I am really finding it hard to be grateful for my life at the moment, and it is really hard to celebrate other peoples sucess and be happy for them and I feel so bad when I find myself thinking why me, when is somebody going to help us and except mental health just like any other condition. I watch programs about people that are suffering and need some help and find myself thinking that I could do with some help and where is my support coming from which is an awful thing to think. am I a terrible person, why cant I just be happy for others and help others when they need it??

[Sweetpea]

Please do try and not feel guilty Alistaire, just be there for your mum.  Its horrible when someone you care for is suffering, especially when you know whats its like to feel so bad.

Smirfy is easy to feel the way way you do when we suffer with depression, I know when I am bad I can think of nothing or anyone else other than how bad I feel.  You are not a terrible person, and I am sure you are not the only one who thinks like this.

S x

[Liv]

I am really finding it hard to be grateful for my life at the moment, and it is really hard to celebrate other peoples sucess and be happy for them and I feel so bad when I find myself thinking why me, when is somebody going to help us and except mental health just like any other condition. I watch programs about people that are suffering and need some help and find myself thinking that I could do with some help and where is my support coming from which is an awful thing to think. am I a terrible person, why cant I just be happy for others and help others when they need it??

Smirfy, I know this feeling. My Dad has given me a tough time over my issues with depression, especially since it resulted in me leaving university. Unfortunately, his new wife was also diagnosed with cancer a few months ago. She had the cancer taken out and is now on chemo and should hopefully be fine in a couple of months time. Obviously, she has got a lot of sympathy and understanding from my Dad and all her friends, which she deserves. But people like us deserve that too but because somehow cancer is seen as unlucky and random and depression is still seen as something to do with personality and the individual, we don't get that support. She talks about how she feels tired all the time and unwell and can't sleep etc and people give her sympathy (as they should) but a depressed person can't talk about these things because people don't understand, and it unnerves people to talk about mental health issues. Sometimes it's hard not to feel a little resentful...

[smirfy21]

I am really finding it hard to be grateful for my life at the moment, and it is really hard to celebrate other peoples sucess and be happy for them and I feel so bad when I find myself thinking why me, when is somebody going to help us and except mental health just like any other condition. I watch programs about people that are suffering and need some help and find myself thinking that I could do with some help and where is my support coming from which is an awful thing to think. am I a terrible person, why cant I just be happy for others and help others when they need it??

Smirfy, I know this feeling. My Dad has given me a tough time over my issues with depression, especially since it resulted in me leaving university. Unfortunately, his new wife was also diagnosed with cancer a few months ago. She had the cancer taken out and is now on chemo and should hopefully be fine in a couple of months time. Obviously, she has got a lot of sympathy and understanding from my Dad and all her friends, which she deserves. But people like us deserve that too but because somehow cancer is seen as unlucky and random and depression is still seen as something to do with personality and the individual, we don't get that support. She talks about how she feels tired all the time and unwell and can't sleep etc and people give her sympathy (as they should) but a depressed person can't talk about these things because people don't understand, and it unnerves people to talk about mental health issues. Sometimes it's hard not to feel a little resentful...

Hi thanks for the support, I hope that your dads new wife recovers from her cancer and goes on to live a healthy and normal life.
thanks for sharing with me, what were you studying at uni I think its really brave that you were able to leave when you did I have to say if I wasn't so close to the end of my final year I too would be leaving uni as it is not making life any easier.
I am sorry to hear that your dad is not as understanding as you would like him to be its not easy when they can't except you are suffering from a genuin medical condition, it has taken my dad 5 years to really except my situation and to start to take some notice although he still gets angry and it causes a lot of arguments and frixon in my household but I know that with time things will get easier.

[Zaf]

Please try not to blame yourself  Alstare, as the others say try to support your mum as much as you can.

Liv is right smirfy, its not fair that depression is treated differently from other illnesses but despite there being a couple of programmes recently on the subject unfortunately I think the stigma from the past will take a long time to ease which accentuates our problems as we feel we have to hide it and put on a brave face to friends and family


Z xx

[Zaf]

IBS has flared up mildly and I've got a mild allergic reaction, I've a sneaky feeling its dried mangoes that are the culprit, I really love them but they'll be another food on the 'forbidden list', I'll feel a bit grotty today so hope it wont bring my mood down too.

[Sweetpea]

Hope you are feeling better Zaf  and its doesn't make your mood drop.

Feeling ok today, quite tired but apart from that good.

S x

[Zaf]

thanks shaz, still rather uncomfortable but so far my mood has only dropped a tiny bit so fingers crossed.

Lots of rest shaz if you're feeling tired (just a gentle nag) xx

[Pete]

Feel drained! Feel sick! Just gonna sit on my own and avoid the world for a bit and hope I find a settled balance.

[Zaf]

 &*(

[Sweetpea]

Only at work this morning, so gentle nag accepted  :) will rest this afternoon.

S x

[Zaf]

 

[Buttercup]

Hope you're feeling better Zaf.
Shaz,  did you manage to have a rest?
I'm shattered, have been doing way to much and need a rest. My mood isn't great either.