How are you feeling today?

[Zaf]

Its a step forward smirfy :)

I dont really do that much with my animals BladeRunner, the horses normally live out with field shelters so I feed and check them twice a day which only takes about 20 minutes, in the summer I usually drive them but its for my pleasure rather than because they need to be worked; the lurchers and greyhound dont care if they are walked or not as they're very laid back but if I take one out they all need to go out or I dont think its fair!

PS - I bought a eurolottery ticket for the first time ever last week and won .............








a whole £2.80 :)

[Holykimura]

Good morning BladeRunner (and everyone else of course) :)

Yes I know the feeling well, as thought my brain is full of cotton wool or I 'm thinking through fog

Hope your all having good days all things considered.

That's exactly how I feel! I also have terrible pains in my lower stomach and feel very sick. I had a chat with my community support worker yesterday. He said I need to get out of the job I'm currently in as my sanity is more important than any financial amount, home or else. He even went ad far saying that he felt that if carried on on that job then I may end up becoming a permanent resident in the mental health wards I've been trying to explain this to my partner but she is adamant that if I quit work it would be doing me more harm than good. I and the support worker explained to her that we have identified the root of my problems and it is work causing me major stress. My partner says hang in their whilst applying for other positions. Now obviously she is concerned about finances and Xmas on the horizon. She is also feeling very run down and expressed yesterday that she didn't know how much more of this she could take so  I don't know what to do

[Zaf]

Hi

I wont repeat what I said replying to your post in another thread but imo you need to get out of that job before you have a complete breakdown, your partner is going to be in a much worse situation if you end up in hospital and I'm afraid if she cant see that or accept it you are going to have to take the bull by the horns and just do it for the sake of your health.

[Lol]

Hi everyone

Munchroom you haven't posted for a while are you ok? You are experiencing a really difficult time at the momet and have so many thoughts and questions about things that I don't like to imagine you being alone with them. I'm sure you have plenty of friends you can talk to but please talk to us if you need to.  :)

Has anyone heard from Depina?

[Zaf]

Would like to hear from you munchroom, even if its just something quick

I was wondering about Depina yesterday, I did think about sending a pm but didnt want to cause problems with her husand

I havent seen Pete round for a while either

How are you lol?  You are a twer of strength here but rarely say how you're feeling

[Lol]

Would like to hear from you munchroom, even if its just something quick

I was wondering about Depina yesterday, I did think about sending a pm but didnt want to cause problems with her husand

I havent seen Pete round for a while either

How are you lol?  You are a twer of strength here but rarely say how you're feeling

That's because I feel throat slittingly sad all the live long day and night and I feel guilty for expressing this here because my sadness is not an illness it is just a product of a break up. Nothing compared to all on here. I know it is all relevent but it just doesn't sit right with me. I am not doing a very good job of getting over things and feel a bit of a fool.  I keep thinking what it is that she is hiding from me as you said and I entertain about 100 thoughts at once all the time awake or asleep. Thoughts range from what did I do, she must have been lying to me for years, how did I not see this coming, was her depression just her going off me, was I abusing her - because she is so extra ordinarily happy now, was I opressing her, how could she not have told me, how dare she not have told me, how dare she not have worked at things, how long was she thinking things were going wrong and not telling me/doing anything about it, how dare she be judging me without telling me and giving me a chance to save the relationship, how dare she how dare she how dare she basically. How DARE she not give me an actual explanation after 8 years of what I truly truly thought was true, deep, mutual love.

Sorry Zaf. It's best not to ask me how I am I think. I can't get past  "£$ week after next I'm going on holiday with my best friend for some serious escapist fun, drunkeness and mischief. I'm really looking forward to that but I am already anxious about coming back! so for now I am sharing a bottle of wine with my cat.
 ^&^ He loves me.

[Zaf]

Lol, I ask how you are because I care how you are, but if you would prefer I didnt you only have to say and I will understand completely.

You shoudnt feel guilty, it may not be clinical depression but you are going through a bad time and deserve to be supported every bit as anyone else.

I find her behaviour very strange and think you deserve a proper explanation but it seems like you wont get one

Its a good idea to take a break with your friend, take it a day at a time and try not think about coming back while you are away, who is looking after your cat?   I hope its a good vintage you're sharing with him tonight, cats are conisours you know

[cornish]

i heard from munch a few days ago, she is going through a hard time.

[Lol]

Thanks Zaf.  :)

Thanks Cornish. I'm glad she has made contact with you. I understand she is going through an awfully difficult time. Send her my love next time you speak to her.

How are you getting through your weekend Cornish?

[Alstare1974]

I feel so low again. I just want my life back but that's not going to happen.

[Zaf]

Thanks cornish, please give her my love if you're in contact again

[Zaf]

I feel so low again. I just want my life back but that's not going to happen.

You may not get your old life back Alstare and I'm not going to say anything as glib as "as one door closes another one opens" but once you get over the dreadful illness that depression is you may see a small opening to rebuild your life in another direction, even though at the moment you really cant see that hapening

[nickynoo]

hey all...still not feeling great not sure if its coz of the reflexology or if I am now coming down with something, been feeling sicky since Wednesday morning . I think the prospect of having to wait 3 months to see a counsellor has knocked me down a bit too, just feel like this is never gonna end.....I'll never be me again. I was thinking of going to see if I can get to see the college counsellor beforehand as I am going out of my mind, maybe they can help me before I start to see the NHS one, worth a try I suppose.

On a good note I managed too go out with a friend I hadn't seen for ages last night, that was after spending about 30 minutes sobbing in the shower (not sure what all that was about really - maybe frustration coz I just want to feel well like I used to, I used to love a good night out and don't have enough energy now, I'm scared too incase this lack of energy and feeling bad all the time is linked to something other than depression).

Hope you are all ok tonight....?  

[Lol]

I feel so low again. I just want my life back but that's not going to happen.

Oh Alstare what an awful feeling  you were going through a more positive stage before. You went out with your friends and experienced happiness. Could you do this again possibly?

[danbob]

had a break from the internet and stuff.... feelin better than i was :)