Hello :)

[copshowlover]

Hello everyone at depression forums......

Newbie here but not to depression and it's various forms and after effects. Have had post natal depression that was undiagnosed for 2 years and has left me with anxiety issues that I still struggle with now.

Struggling a bit at the moment with some things I'm going through, but I'm not quite willing to go back on anti depressants......I have a thing about taking them which might seem strange but I like to be 'in control' and know whether it's me or the tablets that's making me feel better. Does that make any sense? I try and use them like a plaster almost, to get me through the worst times and give me breathing space for a couple of months for the worst cracks to heal. before I come off again and try to work through the rest.

I'm just struggling with some issues and always have this feeling that unless I have a totally positive reaction to something that I'm depressed again, and I really really don't want to be.

Sorry.......will stop rambling now!

Happy Tuesday everyone!

[ParsnipPierre]

Hey copshowlover I'm pretty new to here too,I've only been on a couple of weeks but already feel comforable here cos everyone is supportive and understands which I found normal friends and family didn't understand.I'm only on my 2nd anti depressant and even with them I struggle so the fact you sometimes can cope without them is a credit to you.Hope that this forum can help you with your issues.
PP

[Pip]

 sign0016

I understand over anti depressants.  The first one I was on 2005 / 2006 eventually made me feel like a zombie which I hated so came off it. In 2009 I went onto citalopram which did help for a while but by January last year it didn't help.  I had CBT which did help to a certain extent so my doctor, in her wisdom, decided to stop the citalopram,  I am taking amitriptyline but that's for pain relief and to help me sleep.

[copshowlover]

Thanks for the replies  0158

Does anyone else 'retreat' at times like this into day dreaming? I mean just the usual stuff about being good at something or having money/partner/good job etc? I do. I'm not delusional I know what's real and what's not, sometimes I just need an escape and TV/films or books just don't hold my attention. I can do it for ages, I walk a lot and have my mp3 on and by the time I've got where I'm going I realise I've got there on auto pilot while I've been day dreaming. I can function as in cross the road, wave to people I know etc but it's like it's somewhere 'safe' within my own head and that's not always an easy place to find when you're feeling low is it?
Be interested in your thoughts.
 

[Pip]

Yes I have days like that as well.  Actually I'm listening to Prom Praise atm  :bgrin: which was recorded at the Royal Albert Hall but we went to the Prom Praise at the Sage at Gateshead a few weeks ago where I got the cd.  I can lose myself in music very easily and depending on my mood depends on what I listen too.  I like anything from opera, classical, jazz right through to soul, heavy metal and 60's music. 

[ParsnipPierre]

I tend to do that too,I will sit with my headphones in as much as possible to avoid speaking to people and it helps me feel like i aint there,almost in another world.I love walking and always go on my own even if people offer to go with me I prefer to escape.I know what you mean about being physically there but mentally not,I often wonder how I've got to work it's like a trance.I sit and daydream for hours as much as I hate it cos it reminds me of how depressed I am but I seem to enjoy the escapism???if that makes sense?
PP

[stewart]

Hi copshowlover, welcome to the forums, do you like the old 70s cop shows or just the newer ones?

[copshowlover]

Mainly the newer ones, and the ones I grew up with. Love Morse and then got into Lewis when it started, and I like the American crime drama's all the CSI's and the like. :exc:

[stewart]

good selection there then. i got all the Monk, Columbo, Law & Order, also JAG & NCIS pluss loads more, got a 2 TB disk full of them, as well as a dvd collection that would put some dvd rental shops to shame