New and Need To Talk

[Catbrian]

I don't think you should "man up", anyone one of us would be feeling exactly the same.  Eventually things WILL get better without her.  I understand that you don't want to live anymore, but I promise you, one day that can change.

[MatthewRobinson]

I'm sorry I can't believe that anymore. I know what I need to do.

[Catbrian]

Of course you don't believe you will get better.  The depression is also adding to the negativity.  You do need help, but no one will realise, unless you ask them.  Can you go speak to your GP?

[MatthewRobinson]

I have spoken to my gp he gave me medcation and a referal to the mental health teamwho have yet to cotact me. Noone wants to talk to me. Everyone hates me. I have applied for councilling with uni but don't know.

[Pip]

  I tried to post and lost everything.  No matter how bad life is you need to persevere as life can get better.  The problem is it takes time when you're first diagnosed.  It depends on how busy your mental health team are atm and they have to prioritise.  It's not that you're less important than anybody else with depression but they have to decide who needs contact quickest out of new clients, fit all new clients in with their current clients and so on.  I know that doesn't make you feel any better but they listen when they have contact with you.  If you feel worse before they contact you then let your GP know so that things can be speeded up.

[Catbrian]

Hi Matthew.... How are you today?  I can only second what Pip has said. Community Mental Health Teams are very busy and they do have a bit of a waiting list.  Is there any way you can find out the CMHT's telephone number?  You could call through to reception.  Tell them who you are and how desperate you are for some help.  It might not make them respond to you immediately, but it will put you in their mind.  The beginning is always the worst, but I promise, through time, it does get better. 

[MatthewRobinson]

I feel just as &$%+ today my ex text me last night and it made me so happy but now today all that keeps runnning through my mind is her with someone else. I really can't cope none of the official ways of getting help are actually working noone cares and noone interested.

[stewart]

Hi Matthew, if i had to pick just one saying that i hated the most it would be the 'get over it' one.

anyone who says that has never been in such a deep relationship, or had such strong feelings that you mention.

I would say that the 'official ways of getting help' as you call them are all based around the other person trying to get you to see things in a diferent light, for some it may work and others not so much. If you havent done so already see if there is a MIND office close to you, I find it helpful

[MatthewRobinson]

Thats what my ex thinks I should do and I don't know how she has anaged to do it.

What do you mean a mind?

[Catbrian]

MIND is an organisation set up for people with depression and other mental health problems. They are a marvelous source of support and are usually quicker at getting things up and running, such as some therapy.  You can find their contact details online or in a telephone directory, there should be one in your area.

Sorry, I don't understand that last post...what does your ex think you should do?

[Pip]

I think Matthew means his girlfriend expects him to get over it.

Matthew it's easier said than done to get over anything.  I lost count of the times I used to get told by mum to pull myself together which is one one of my pet peeves.  At the time I didn't I was suffering with depression ~ this was in my teens ~ and my family thought I was just a moody teenager.  It took till I was 43 to be 'officially' be diagnosed with severe depression. 

[MatthewRobinson]

I have never heard of MIND before are they a UK organisation?

Yeah its what a good friend recently said to me like my best friend they just said I really just think you need to get over her. I still love her so much.

[Catbrian]

In my own experience, I really didn't get over it.... more like you get used to them not being there.  I'm not so sure if time is a healer, but it certainly helps build that distance.  MIND is a UK organisation and there probably is one in your area.  If you're looking for support fast, they are your best bet.