Hello.

[Redsimmy]

Hello everyone,
                    I've joined the site as a place to hopefully talk to people in a similar situation as my own. I haven't been diagnosed with depression as I'm too scared to go to my GP, not only do I feel as if I will be letting myself down but what if they think I'm lying? I've always been a very paranoid person and recently it has gotten much worse. I spend most nights awake until 6 in the morning, tossing and turning worrying about little things I have said or done which I know deep down mean nothing but I just cannot shake the feeling of dread. I started University this year, which I hoped would make things better. Instead I feel worse, I feel isolated in a city miles from friends and family and I failed to submit my last piece of work or even attend my final week due to lack of sleep and anxiety. I've felt like this for years but always managed to hide it by putting up a warm and friendly exterior and keeping thoughts like this to myself, however recently my negative side has been bleeding through into my everyday life, with my flatmates noting a significant change in personality. Due to work I'm staying at my residence until the 23rd of December and as such I have been here alone for a week now, only leaving when I have to take myself to work. What do I do? I've let everyone down by failing to do my work, I feel so embarrassed to tell people the truth. I have another essay due at 4pm tomorrow (today technically) and although I know the subject matter inside out whenever I go to write it, I feel close to tears.

Sorry for the overload of emotional bs, I just needed to write it down somewhere.

Thanks for having me, I hope to speak to some people in a similar situation soon.

Simon

[mat]

Hey welcome to the site.

I can ensure you that your GP wont think you are lying,  you already are living in a dark place in life, how more worse can it get from seeking help from people who understand what you are going through.

[Michael Frankum]

 +_+ This is a safe place to get things out in the open. The people on this site have been fantastically understanding and supportive to me, and I'm sure that you can find the same response. People here often can sympathise over similar experiences, but nobody judges. As Mat said, it's important to let your GP know what's going on, so that you can get the help you need. It's difficult trying only to show one side of you, but you are a real whole person. If you are worried about going to the GP alone, have you a trusted friend who understands your problems, who can offer to be with you as support? Anyway, welcome to the forums. It's a good safe place to explore feelings. I hope that you can get the things you need here.

[stewart]

if youyr gp is any good, they will understand maybe give you something to help a bit,,and refer you on to the right people.

[Pip]

 $£$ , I knew deep down I suffered with depression for many years but wouldn't see my GP about it for loads of reasons including being accused of being an attention seeker and moody by my mum.  When I was 'officially' diagnosed in 2005 it was a real relief to know I wasn't making excuses for myself and I really was depressed.  It's okay to speak to your GP instead of suffering in silence.

[Zaf]

Hi and welcome  *()

Go to your GP, they are usually pretty clued up about mental illness these days and wont think you're lying.

Z xx

[Jon]

Hi redsimmy. I'm new to the site too.
Here in the UK, GPs will welcome many patients who are suffering all kinds of depression. In my experience, GPs are a little too quick to hand out so-called happy pills (Prozac etc.) I've known people who have shown remarkable recovery by using antidepressants. Then again, I've known people who have had negative experiences with those pills. I'm in the latter group. I'm sure there's many people on this forum who will happily advise about the pros and cons of antidepressants, and will also be able to advise on the alternatives to pills. Hope you feel better soon. My best, Jon