Its been a while...!

[Marie1991]

Havent been on here for a few months now. Back again to let off some steam.
In my Health and Social Care course we have to studying counselling. Ive never really had a problem with it until today when we were given a sheet to fill out called- A model of a person. Where I had to write about my early childhood, significant life events etc, everything I wanted to write was so negative. Re-thinking everything and realising things again has put me in a really really low mood. I guess I've put myself back into a bubble to try and bloke things out. I've got 8 months left at home, and couldnt be more excited about finally getting my qualification, moving out and actually being happy!
Struggling to put up with the mother comments though...
''Are you sure you want to answer the door like that, I know you care what people think'' (I actually dont care what i look like!)
''Oh your the type to have a baby to get a house'' I responded with ''Shows how much you think of me..'' and she said ''No Becky, thats just your low self esteem''
But its not... its like she almost wants me to feel like this. How can I cope

[nocaph]

This is an honest question - how much do you care what she thinks?  How much do you value her opinion on things like that?

[Marie1991]

I really really don't at all. But when someone is trying to mess around with a weakness you have all the time and mind games is hard not to listen to and not to take in. Just need to get on, not long left here after christmas- phew!!

[Marie1991]

And now shes given me a few weeks to find somewhere else to live because I havent cleaned the kitchen. I don't understand how her mind works  *^* lowest of the low right now.

[mat]

If you ask me I think you are better living somewhere else , if at most your situation at home is enabling your depression,  something in which i can relate to , I am waiting for a house/flat of my own.

on the short term if you are struggling to find anywhere to live , it may be beneficial to go "homeless"  it should almost get you a social house/flat  quicker.

[Pip]

Although it's good to have an update I'm sorry life isn't any better.  Must admit I was hoping that you had been able to move out %^% 

[Marie1991]

Found it really difficult to find somewhere, and being a student a lot of landlords and shared housing didnt want that. There has to be something out there to help otherwise I will be homeless. Going to try my best.

[Got]

How much do you value her opinion on things like that?

She is her mother, so probably quite a high value.

Marie1991: - you say ''moving out and finally being happy.'' Except life doesn't work like that. You have to work on being happy now, it is rare that you can successfully pick a point in the future and say ''I will be happy then.'' The issues with your mother and your childhood will still be with you and you will still have the same psychology. However, I do not know your history so I do not know what has been going on.

My comment isn't a negative one, it does not mean that you cannot be happy, it just takes some work.

Steve X

[Marie1991]

No of course I completely agree with what you have said. I do need to work on my happiness. Removing myself from the situation is one of the things that would help me.

[Got]

I hope so. X