sick with worry about my business finances...

[Jayfur]

I'm sorry if this is not directly depression related or I'm posting it in the wrong place but I need to talk to somebody as I am sick with worry.  My business is in dire straits financially, I have to find a huge amount of money over the next six months to pay the taxman, 'x' much a month, or I will have to go bankrupt or whatever.   I just don't know where I will find it.  In two weeks I have to make a large payment, after that it's monthly for the next 5 months.  I CANNOT default on payments  or it will be the end of my business.  I am lucky in that, if the business does go under, I won't be out on the streets, I have a hubby who has a job and he owns our house etc etc, but I am still sick with worry.  Gut response is to want to hide inside the bottom of a bottle, but I can't do that as I gave up drinking over a year ago and take a drug to help me stay off it, it makes me very sick if I drink whilst on the meds.   I used to self harm but don't now, but again, the gut response is to be tempted to do that - but I know that that won't actually help the situation.  I feel like I'll not be able to sleep for the next six months.  Today, I don't even have enough money to pay my staff at the end of the month.  As I say, in two weeks I need to find a large sum, I genuinely don't know how I will do that.  I don't have family who will bale me out.  Hubby and I don't have personal savings, and besides, I wouldn't take our personal money for this - it's MY business and hubby shouldn't have to pay to bale me out.   I know what i need to do - look at the products which sell well and see if I can push their prices up, and look at what's not selling and reduce the prices to get them moving and convert them back into cash (I'm an internet retailer), but I really don't know if that will be enough.   All I can do is the best I can, and at the end of the day, come the deadline(s), if I don't have enough money, what will be, will be.   On paper, when I sit down and work out the pennies, theoretically I should be able to manage, albeit just, but in practice, I am scared to death that my best won't be enough.   I feel like I'm trapped in a living nightmare and there is no easy way out - I can't just stick my head in the sand, I have to tough it out and walk through the flames, and I don't know what will be at the other side, whether I will still have a business six months down the line.

I don't know if I am ok to post this here or if it is not relevant, apologies if I've made a booboo by posting this here, but I just badly needed to talk about it.   If anyone's read this far, thanks for listening.

[Zaf]

I'm sure its OK to post here but if not Pip will move it to a more appropriate section.

Running your own business can be a nightmare and I dont envy your predicament, I've had many sleepless nights worrying about cashflow and knowing the VAT payment is due when there seems no way of paying it.  You seem to be tackling it in a very sensibe way and I hope you can get it sorted out OK

Z xxx

[Jayfur]

Thank you so much for your words Zaf, reading them felt just like getting a loving hug   %^%    I only went vat registered recently and I had no idea the vat was going to be so high - what a shock.   I really want to make myself remember that worrying won't help, planning and working hard will.  I want to aim to work hard when I'm at work, but then enjoy my time at home with my family and not let that time be spoiled with worry.   It really helps if I can come and talk here, I don't expect or want others to feel they have to utter great words of wisdom or advice, just for them to give me a virtual hug is wonderful - it helps me stay calm if I know people care.   Thanks again Zaf  xxx

[Zaf]

I try to put the vat away in a seperate account each week if I can then it doesnt come as quite a shock but of course the temptation is to use it when things get tight.

People here do care, sometimes they dont feel well enough to post but everyone tends to look out for each other in here  _)_   %^% %^%

[sad sack]

first things first, do not ignore the VAT man!

here is a link to help out, with some contact details etc... they will try and help out, as long as you talk to them...

http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/vat/managing/payments/problems.htm

do you have accounts, cash flows etc I.e. do you know the real position of your business!?!?!?

it is tough going, try not to worry too much and get as much information as possible, and contact the VAT people...

HTH

:-D

[Sweetpea]

I feel for you this a terrible situation to be in.  I do hope you manage to keep your business going.

S x x x x

[Anthony 996]

I may be able to add a little here..
In 2007 I had an accident at work. I was a self employed Roofing contractor and employed 3 Men..

Because of My inability to work and keep an eye on things the business started to struggle then when the recession hit in 2008 things went badly downhill..

So what did I do ? I buried My head in the sand thinking that I could get around the obstacles and keep the Guys in work.. Sadly this was impossible !

My accountant called a meeting and we discussed the options and it was decided that I had to take the tough decision to close the business and make the Guys redundant (For Me this was the hardest and most traumatic thing that had to be done)

If I had taken that decision just a few months earlier My finances would have been at the point of closure altogether different !!

By burying My head in the sand things just got worse and the financial pot of money the business worked from disappeared at an alarming rate.

As it was I was able to settle in full with the VAT and Tax-man and all suppliers and pay of the Guys.. Leaving nothing I'm afraid..

My point is Please do not allow things to continue on !!

If the business is not making money or at least staying on an even keel then face up to it and get it sorted....

Why ? Well its clear the worry of it all is getting You down in a big way just as it did for Me...  Its clear now how and where My health problems started ... Please don't let this happen to You..

Ant.

[Ezel]

The thread is fine here as your business is adding to your stress.  Glad that others are being able to help and give good advice.  It's easier said than done at times to get everything written down so you can prioritize what needs dealing with first.

[Jayfur]

You're absolutely right Pip, I too tried to put money away each month for the VAT but, as you say, when things get tight....ah, the joy of hindsight.

Sad Sack, don't worry, I'm not ignoring the VAT man, quite the opposite - it's not my style to play 'ignore it and it'll go away'.  I've already made a payment plan which they've agreed to.   Today I put a sale on two of my three internet selling sites, reduced everything by either 5 or 10%, pains me to do it but I need to try and get cash fast.  If, God willing, I can raise enough to get over this immediate problem, then I know what to do thereafter.   I know I am doing the right things in a practical way, but I hate the constant pain of a tight stomach from the stress, and my back and shoulders are killing me - a sure symptom of stress - I hunch over my desk when I'm stressed.

Anthony, thank you for your story, I got a lot from it.  Hindsight is a wonderful thing.   But I'm not burying my head in the sand, I'm trying to assess it all with my head and not my heart, and act accordingly.  ANd Shaz, thank you for your kind words, another verbal hug, I really appreciate those  :)

I really want to try and get through this without resorting to self harm, but it's so tempting, it releases endorphines (I think), anyway it relaxes me physically, but I really don't want to have to do it.   I've done so well to not harm badly for a few years now, I would be so disappointed if I gave in, and so would hubby.   Thank goodness for my Antabuse medication (which makes me very sick if I drink alcohol) or I would be down the bottom of a bottle by now.

I am going to go and walk my doggies in the local recreation ground after work tonight, I did that yesterday after work and made a new friend, another dog owner, we walked together and chatted while the dogs all played together, and for an hour I was happy and relaxed and almost forgot the stress.   I fancy some more of that. 

I'm so glad I can come here and share this, I don't know what I'd do if couldn't do that.

Thanks for being here, all of you. %^%