not eating

[rubyjean]

Hello people, I wonder if anyone can help me. On th 4th july I took a large overdose with the intention of not surviving. Unfortunately intensive care operators decide otherwise. On the 8th july I was released from hospital on the understanding I stayed with my sister, this lasted 2 days and i returned back home. The thing is I havent been able to eat anything since the 4th july, I dont know if this is an effect of the overdose or not. If so how long does it last. I have thought that it might be natures way of helping me get off the planet in which case I will go along with it. How long can an adult go without food before things start to shut down.

[Ducky]

Hello; your post distresses me and you really ought to see your GP - if he/she is the caring sort, if not see one who is. After my son died, I lost my appetite and I also wondered if that would be a good and relatively painless way of ending the overwhelming sadness. But I knew it would never bring him back, nor would he want me to do it. You need strength, an understanding GP and a caring circle of friends. You have family, I have disowned mine so you are better off than me in that respect. If you have absolutely no one to turn to, there is always this forum or The Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 or email jo@samaritans.org

There is help and treatment out there.

Be strong,

Ducky &(*

[Zaf]

I agree, you really need to see your GP

Z xx

[Sweetpea]

I also urge you to see your Dr about this. S x x x

[Catbrian]

I think Duck's advise is the best way forward.  The GP can help with vitamins and various drinks, if you can't eat.

You deserve the help on offer...reach out.

Best wishes

[KateG]

Hope you can get some help rubyjean

Kate x

[Pedro]

Hi, do you just have no appetite but could eat if you forced yourself? Or are you unable to swallow it for whatever reason (ie it makes you feel sick)?
I agree with the others that a trip to the Gp would be worthwhile as a starter.

[rubyjean]

Thankyou for your replies. I am now on day 16 of not eating anything. I have been able to consume one complan drink a day recently. I have tried thinking of all the foods I used to enjoy but there is not a hint of wanting to eat them. On the 15th of July I stopped my citalopram, 40mg which I had been taking for nearly 4 years. Withdrawal is not pleasant but I have decided that maybe they are not doing anything for me as regards depression. As well as not seeming to require food my body has decided it does not need much more than 2 hours sleep in a 24 hour period.  My concentration has become so bad that I do not trust myself to drive at the moment but I do not seem to be able to get very far by walking before palpitations take hold and I am forced to scuttle back to the house. I feel an absolute mess but do not see that my Gp can change the situation. I most of the time do not want to be here but people I know are trying to stake claims on bits of my life and telling me I cannot try again. I dont know how much more I can take of these thoughts. A person took me for a walk along a river on Monday, it looked so cold and dark, it was really fast flowing too, I found myself stood there fixated thinking walk in, lay on my back and see where it takes me, today and each day since this thought has invaded my thinking space. How the hell do I go to my Gp and tell her that one, its so scary what my mind throws at me just lately. Any ideas on what is going on, am I losing my marbles once and for all.

[Got]

Hi,

I can give you an idea what is going on, and I hope that you will follow my advice - I am concerned about you but no, you have not lost your marbles once and for all.

You appear to be experiencing a major depressive episode. Not eating and not sleeping are strong symptoms of this. Your body is not trying to kill you.

You have decided to stop talking the medication, this is not helping you at all. You are having suicidal ideation, perhaps even suicidal urges. You see no point in anything and you see few solutions. This is all symptomatic of real depression.

However, this situation is entirely fixable and so I would like you to follow my advice. Please go to the GP and tell them everything. Your symtpoms are classic of major depression and so there should be no raised eyebrows. Please tell the GP about suicidal thinking. It is not strange, its a symptom of your depression. Nobody will think you strange for telling the truth about everything. You should recommence the medication when you see the GP. There are very many medications that do not drug you up, and there are many therapies that you can have that can help you. All these options are open to you should you wish to choose them.

You should defiantly not try to commit suicide because all of this is entirely treatable.

Love Steve X

[rubyjean]

Hi Stevie
To update I was dragged to the doctors yesterday by my sister.  Sertraline has been prescribed not sure I know enough about it to want to take it, but with a sister like mine dont have much choice. Got to go back on monday, seeing a different doctor which makes me feel like how can I trust anyone to say how I really feel. The river is so frightening now, it seems to be there all the time, almost calling me. cant stop it, once on the thought I seem to get stuck and dont know how to think other stuff to block it out. Any idea how sertraline will effect these thoughts, will it stop them, how long, how many more nights do i have to spend like this. Some times my mind is travelling a hundred miles an hour while my body is at a standstill, is this all normal. I know I need help, but the river, it is there all the time, just to float away would be so cool.
Trudi.

[Zaf]

Those feelings can be so very tempting Trudi, mine arent a river but some sort of warm backness gently overwhelming me and I have the means to achieve that at any time as I grow hemlock and have a large hoard of various medications that will also do the job.  So far I've avoided the temptation because I know the hurt it will cause to those around me,I hope that will also keep you from taking that ultimate dcision.

Z xxx

[Ezel]

rubyjean, I'm glad your sister is there to make sure you go to the doctors and so, can you talk her openly over how you feel?

[rubyjean]

Hi Pip, I have tried to tell her what my thoughts are and she responds with oh you are depressed you need antidepressants, I know she is reacting the way she is because she is my sister, but I dont think she even acknowledges how I feel and how much I need to do what I have to. Feels like she is saying I dont approve of what you are thinking and someone will make you do what I want them to, ie, the doctor will make you do what I want you to do. She even said she would get me sectioned, this has made me think I had better not tell her what I am thinking anymore, I dont think i can trust her anymore.
Trudi.

[Catbrian]

Rubyjean....the advise Steve gave you in his post is spot on.  It was then a great relief to read your sister had taken you to the Docs.  However, I think it might be more beneficial to try see the same GP for reviews.  Maybe also get a referral to the local Mental Health Team.  You might find them immensely invaluable during your darker moments.

All this upsetting thinking is typical to depressive illness.  The intensity is probably a direct result of the Citalopram withdrawal.  Suddenly stopping any anti-depressant can, in my experience, completely warp our senses.  

It's good you're now on Sertraline.  But, anti-depressants work completely differently on each individual.  What I believe you will hopefully experience over the coming days, is a lesser degree of thoughts to self harm.  The standard guideline for how long the pills take to have any significant benefit is usually a minimum of three weeks.  In my experience, often the immediate drowsy effect helps calm our mind and after a week or two, if they're gonna work at all, they usually start to take effect.

Unfortunately it's a long journey but I'm pleased you've found the Forum to help you through it.  Write as much and as often as you like.  Perhaps you may find some direction in the process.

Thinking of you Rubyjean