i cant remember whether i introduced myself when i registered on this site early last may 2011.i found some posts that id forgotten but not an introduction,nor can i find myself in the list.indeed my confidence is feeling so battered as i write this that i could be insensible about whwther im in the right place.
to say that the last 15 months has been an adventure would not be the appropriate word.
i think im still in my 4th episode of depression.this,for me has been the longest and most difficult for me,and probably for others although at leasdt one person close to me things my episode in 2002 was worse when i seemed aparently completely disconnecetd from the world and everything.i think it must have been pretty clear how miserable i was then.
one ofthe things i dont like about my depression is that its forces me to be much more self obssessed and ego-centric than i like or feel comfortable with.i dont like being focussed on misery either and dont intend to do so her any more than i have to but then on the other hand i want to understand it in order to manage or change it.
i was a professional probation officer working for the local probation trust when this episode started.i am no longer and in one sense ive seen a rather ignominious premature ending of a career,although 40+years of working in predominantly public sctor,public service,welfare state and related employment,even if not at its most dangerous or difficult edges is i guess enough for anyone.......(to be continued here or elsewhere on the forums)
diffi
