Hi

[Lol]

Hope everything goes well Karian. Thinking of you and your family.

Lol xx

[Karian]

little update on me, got my liver scan done a few weeks ago and I have "in simple terms" fatty liver disease which I am dealing with have changed my diet and trying to rectify that.
I almost a fortnight ago I went to the colposcopy clinic and the surgeon took a smear and cut away all the cells and also took a biopsy from the womb, at the same time he asked if I wanted the merina coil fitted which if there is nothing sinister will help lighten the blood loss long term. I said yes so  if I did get the all clear I wouldnt need to go back, my smear result came back clear on Thursday no biopsy results yet but I am hopeful.

The mirena is giving me severe cramps, I am in agony a lot of the time, the surgeon did warn me it can take 6 wks to settle in so I just hope it hurrys up as the pain is draining.

my fabulous psychitrist is getting right on my nerves, I saw him the day before I went to the colposcopy clinic and he came out and waved over and said just give me a few minutes and walked into the reception area of the health centre, 5 mins later he shouted me through and asked how the liver scan had gone, told him it was fatty liver and I am trying to rectify that and he than said "yeah thats what I was through doing checking the results" WTF did he think I was going to lie to him, and make it out to be something it wasn't. needless to say the rest of the appointment I replied with one word answers cause I was so bloody angry. I asked for help, why would I be trying to feck that up?

I have my OT out at the end of Feb and I am going to ask her opinion on changing psychiatrists I dont trust him one little bit, I find him complacent he has told me on more than one occasion "I painted myself into this corner and cant see my way out" I want some sort of proper treatment he is not interested in dealing with me I can sense it, and my OT is his sidekick (she is part of his MH team) so she will back him, but even she I like but have made not one bit of progress in over 1yr.
I am also going to request a referral to a psychologist to see if he can find out why I am the way I am and how I change it.
I know what triggered it but dont know how to sort it.

plus side me and Ian are getting on much better he has been really supportive and our oldest son has been a great help too x

Anyway just want to let you all know I am still here and fighting fit (physically anyway )

[Zaf]

Thank for the update Karen, you really are going through a lot at the moment   can you ask your GP for some stronger pain killers do you think?

Its important to trust and be comfortable with members of your MH team, its well worth asking if you can change

Thinking of you xx

[Munchroom]

Good to see you psoting Karen  :)

Zaf is right, you need to be comfortable with the people that you are seeing. Some doctors attitudes can be incredibly infuriatiing - to say that you have 'painted yourself into a corner'?! I think you have every right to be angry!

I'm pleased you and Ian are getting on better :)

Please keep us posted, will be thinking of you xx

[Glen53]

Physciatrists always seem to have an 'attitude'. Over the years I have seen two and both were right 'so-and-sos!'

Do you speak to a councilor too? You may find it more help than the psych.

Im glad things are easing up a bit for you though.  :)

[Karian]

Thanks for the responses

I was given loads of meds the day it got done I was taking 43 tablets a day including painkillers, anti cramping, 2 different meds to stop the bleeding, plus my mental health drugs.
and even with all them I was sore a lot of the time, I am now down to just painkillers and anti cramping and my mental health drugs, the pain now only starts to get sore enough to need painkillers in the evening, think it is with being up and about all day.

Yeah, I dont trust him at all, and feel he couldnt care less. I havent seen a counsellor but my friend who works in a psychiatric hospital in the admin side mentioned a psychologist or a CBT to try and make real changes. I am not sleeping properly either, (7.04am here just now) and I havent closed my eyes.

I was livid with him saying I painted myself in a corner, yes I did with bloody good reason at the time.
Ian has been unbelievable I couldnt ask for anything more, he has been supportive in every way possible.

I have my GP a fortnight on wednesday and going to sound her out about my mental health team, I am at the stage now where, I am content, mentally I am stable (not happy but not sad all the time either) so the meds are working, so I dont see the point in visiting my psychiatrist every few weeks.
I mentioned to Ian yesterday I am ready to jack in the mental health team and just get my script from my gp, as I am no further forward than a year ago.
and if fact that was the other thing the psychiatrist mentioned was that I first saw him last xmas, perhaps it is just the stress that triggers my down moods,
even though I had Christmas all done and dusted, xmas day we just done finger buffet so no-one was stuck in the kitchen all day, I also didnt visit anyone so had nothing to stress me, xmas was fine. so him presuming I was stressed it was just stupid.

I have started making cards, (was doing it before I got ill) but have just restarted again this week and I am so content as doing it occupies my mind without the dark clouds circling over head.
and all my card sales the money is going to a holiday respite home in Blackpool (England) it was burnt out in an arson attack 4 days before xmas, so I am donating all funds to that for the near future. then just maybe I can do craft fayres and try and recoup some money for materials x

[Glen53]

You sound so much more positive and you should be really proud of the progress you have made  :)

I know what you mean about the mental health teams. Im not saying they are all bad but they dont seem too 'motivated' in a lot of cases to do much to help, they just check on you and go. Psyhs seem to want to wind you up to see if you crack and its all real! I would just stick with a good councilor if you feel that you dont need them.

Getting on with making your cards is another good sign that you are improving. So often when we are so low, the hobbies are the first thing to go - we just dont have the motivation. I think its lovely that you are raising funds as you do this.

Well done you. Be proud of what you have achieved so far. It says a lot about your spirit and character.

[Zaf]

Hi,  I agree with Glen 100%, its lovely to see you improving xx