Can someone please help me?

[Keren]

Hi, I've managed to find somewhere that can give me help and support just by email, which can change to on the phone support if I want it to. It's the only way I'm going to feel safe. I had such a bad day today (or yesterday) I was on the verge of giving up.. now maybe there's some hope   xx

[KateG]

That's good news Keren &*(

[Zaf]

Thats brilliant, well done for being brave enough for taking that first very important step

Z xxx

[Keren]

Hopefully this will help me.. thank-you for all your encouragement when I've been feeling down.. I feel a bit more hopeful now  xx

[Sweetpea]

Thats good to hear Keren, we are here for you  ^&^.

S x x

[Keren]

i didnt want to have to bother yiu all again , i thought id be ok. but im not. ive hardly had any sleep, just an hour last night.  I have to put this on here because i could feel myself withdrawing from it just like i am with the doctors. i dont want to be like this, im scared of it. i feel like im going mad, i hope you dont mind me coming back, i know ive got a big problem, i need you to tell me im going to be alright,. im sorry if i sound all over the place but i really am scared.

[Buttercup]

Don't worry, thats what we are here for  :) :) :)

Not sleeping is terrible, it really makes everything seem a lot worse.  I hate lying awake at night. 

I kept my problems hidden from the world for years, just because I was scared to tell people how I felt.  In the end I was forced to go to the doctors, I was in a situation where I had no choice, work told me to go and get signed off.  With hindsight it was the best thing and TBH the only good thing that came out of that job.  I know that I can't work for the foreseeable and realised that yes I have to see a psychiatrist and some people are funny about that, but I'm not going to hide it, I've done enough of that.  I don't know what my family think and I don't care, I needed help.  I'm bipolar and people get a bit wired about that, like I odd but I take the meds and it's ok.

I know your situation is different and it's really hard for you.  But one day I really hope that you can see a doctor.  I was scared I'd end up in a hospital, I was really wired and off the wall when I got diagnosed.  But I didn't, it really is a last resort.  Someday I know it's a possibility that I will but I'm not scared anymore, the psychiatrist told me that if it were to happen they keep you in for the shortest time possible. 

Take care

Love Buttercup xxx

[Zaf]

we will never feel bothered Keren and we will help you all we can for as long as you need us to,  depression can take a long time to recover from but I know its possible to recover from it eventually.

With love, Z xxx

[Keren]

thankyou, i just thought tthat it would be ok but its not. i do keep this hidden, i have to, i dont have family but my husband , i he wouldnt like it. ive only been like this since i started reallly remmembering things, i just thought i would be ok but im not. the fear of doctors has got worse over the years but i never worried about it , now im like this and everything is rolled into one. i wish i could just see someone but it feels impossible,. i hope youre right and that is possible to get over it,,  i wass looking at , i cant remember what theyre called,,,,,,,, where you post new threads, but i dont know where i would put mine,, is it best to just stay here?  i need this as a base for myself, i had trouble coming on here this morning, i knew id be the sssame as the drs if i didnt get back on here.  thankyoufor the things youve both said,  my typing is bad but im so tired

[Zaf]

I will give you access to our private space Keren, you can start a new thread in there.

Z xx

[KateG]

I'll post properly when you start your other thread Keren