How are you feeling today?

[Depina]

Yes Zaf-it was the right thing,

Just  look after yourself, it is dreadful. must be so hard.

Thinking of you and sending you HUGS  *(*

[Zaf]

Needless to say still feeling very weepy and down, I just wish someone could have said something that changed her mind but although they tried it wasnt enough

[Lol]

Zaf I don't think there was anything anyone COULD have said. If that were true we could talk ourselves out of this couldn't we? Sometimes the balance is tipped too far over. I'm so sorry x

[Zaf]

You're probably right lol, thanks for your support x

[Alstare1974]

How did they find out Zaf, if you don't mind me asking.

Am sorry to say I've been having some pretty dark thoughts :-(

[Zaf]

She posted some very weird things on a forum, heartbreaking things that showed she wasin terrible turmoil; people that knew her via facebook tried to contact her on there, then somehow they got in touch with people that knew her phone number, when that went unanswered for some time they called the police who found her body

please do think of all the people that would be affected so badly if you took that ultimate step Alstare, when I was at my lowest some years ago I convinced myself that everyone would be better off without me but after losing two people I know from suicide I know how wrong I was and how devastating it is when someone you know ends it all - it must be millions times worse for their families

[Alstare1974]

Feeling a bit tearful again. Getting really fed up of feeling so blue.

[Lol]

Alstare let some thoughts out mate. What are your thoughts and how does your blueness feel? You will be happy again x

[Zaf]

Got to admit I'm not doing good again, I think I may well go to bed and shut out the world for a bit and hope things look brighter in the morning

[Lol]

I hope you manage to get the rest you need Zaf. There's no point in doing more than you feel able it will just set you back. Feel better tomorrow

[Alstare1974]

I feel scared of what the future will bring and what's going to happen to my life.

[Lol]

That's awfully sad and confusing for you. It sounds like you are saying that you feel uncertain and unnerved and that is very frightening and isolating for you. You are trying to make sense of a lot at the same time at the moment and that is very difficult to do all at once. You are scared that it will always be like this and wont stop. You can recover from your current situation. You are going through a crisis. During times of crisis it is very normal to feel unsafe and unsure because there is too much to understand all at once. As you explore all your muddled up feelings, memories and emotions you simply can not feel ok. But it is a period of change, and change will occur. It wont be like this forever. It will be different. What would you like your future to bring?

[cornish]

I feel scared of what the future will bring and what's going to happen to my life.

i feel like that a lot of the time, if you do have p.t.s.d. then rationally its just an illness that you can recover from but its going to be a long and hard road.  you may not believe it but you could be a lot worse.
now dont get me wrong im not trying to do the old "my dads harder than your dad" thing but im suffering from a few diffrent illnesses and one i may never recover from, every gp, phychiatris, mental health team has no idea how im still able to work.  but the point of what im saying is no matter how bad it seems, you can fight this but you need to try hard, i know its easier said than done and well i dont really follow my own advice most of the time . but you will eventually find a copeing method, mine is crap, its work work work and lots of lolly pops 


by the way the cbt type person says haveing something like a lolly or sweets when you know your going to be anxious can help.  shame i cant remember th reason why 

[angel3077]

 "£" that is how I am feeling. Dont wanna have to speak to anyone, worried about the future but a bit hopeful that counselling might help. Anxious about counselling though. Oh and a bit tired been awake since 5am. The joys of depression.

[Zaf]

Very tired but a bit less negative today thank goodness, making myself rest cos I know I need to and trying not to feel guilty about all the stuff that needs doing round here.

Counselling is usually a bit nerve wracking at first angel, and sometines a bit uncomfortable but a good counsellor can really make a lot of difference, hopefully yours will be as brilliant as my last one