DICTIONARY FOR THE CHURCH Part 2

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DICTIONARY FOR THE CHURCH
Part 2

MANGER:
The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough.

PEW:
A medieval torture device still found in most churches.

PROCESSION:
The ceremonial formation at the beginning of service, consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats.

RECESSIONAL:
The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of service - led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.

RELICS:
People who have been going to church for so long, they actually know when to sit and stand.

TEN COMMANDMENTS:
The most important Top Ten List NOT given by David Letterman.

USHERS:
The only people in the parish who don't understand the seating capacity of a pew.