Author Topic: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...  (Read 8140 times)

Amanda_George

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Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« on: July 07, 2018, 08:41:20 AM »
Yesterdays rant in my blog:

"Steve is my hubby and carer.


Mitzi is our senior pup.


I asked Steve to do two things yesterday and he promised it would happen for sure.


The first was to make pasta bake for our lunch/tea and the second was to take Mitzi on the first family walkies 'cos all three of us enjoyed them last time they happened regularly.


Steve did neither of those things today.  I knew he wouldn't.  He never does, despite being paid to be my carer for at least 25 hours a week.  The reality is that I struggle to get an hour of care out of him a week and that's usually the few seconds it takes to do my bra up for me.


I asked him about when we were having the pasta bake at lunchtime.


"It's too hot to cook" says he.


"So we're not having it for tea either then?" says me.


"Nope, definitely tomorrow though.  Promise" says he.


I asked him about taking the pup out for her family walkies when he got home from his nurse appointment.


"It's too hot out there right now" says he.  "We'll definitely go this evening when it's cooled down though.  Promise"


I've just asked him what time it will be cool enough for him to take her out.


"About 2am" says he.


"All three of us will be asleep then though" says me, starting to get angry.


"Yep.  Sorry" says Steve.


So I've just taken Mitzi out for her walk and fed her.


25 hours a week is just over 3 hours a day for 7 days yeah?


In the last 7 days, Steve's done my bra up once and that's it.  Less than a minute under his "carer" title.


Even if you include the household tasks as caring, he's put the powder into the washing machine and turned it on once which took less than a minute, so that's 3 minutes of caring so far this week, yeah?


He's cooked once this week so even if you include the 20 minute cooking time and 5 minutes plating up, that's 25 minutes caring, plus the 3 minutes from the previous paragraph, means that he's cared for me for 28 minutes this week, not the 25 hours he's being paid for!!


If he'd spent those 25 hours caring for me then I wouldn't have minded not having the pasta bake and taking Mitzi for her walk, but he hasn't even spent half an hour caring for me this week instead of the 25 hours he's being paid for!


He's got a job too that he's being paid for, yet he spends the majority of the day and night asleep then complains when his boss asks him how he's getting on with one of the tasks that he hasn't even started because he's asleep for 20 hours a f**king day!!


He's sat in his chair snoring his head of now and he's only just turned his computer on for the first time since yesterday afternoon!!


When I met up with C yesterday he asked me if I'd ever thought about moving away and I said sometimes - this is one of those times, if you're reading, C!


C does more for me in 2 hours a couple of times a month than Steve does in a f**king month of living with me!  C is more like my carer than my own husband and C's not even being paid for it!!"

Today's rant in my blog:

"Just asked Steve if he was going to come on family walkies with me and the pup today, like he's promised for the last few days but he said he wasn't so that's one promise broken yet again.  I asked him what we were having for tea and he said it was too hot to cook so I said about him promising yesterday that we'd have pasta bake today.  His reply?  "Oh yeah, sorry".


Same with Patrick's insurance.  I asked him to phone up to renew it as soon as I saw the renewal come through, he said he'd do it "later" so I emailed them to find out what time they closed.  6pm.  Steve said he'd definitely do it before then, but he didn't, so I'm gonna do it online on Tuesday using the insurers new online renewal system that goes live on Tuesday morning.


He does this all the time... promises something then goes back on it so I've given up now.  As far as I'm concerned, Steve's promises are worthless from now on."

Anyone see a pattern here?   :(
« Last Edit: July 07, 2018, 08:49:44 AM by Amanda_George »
Money talks, chocolate sings!  :-D

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Amanda_George

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Re: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« Reply #1 on: July 07, 2018, 09:11:52 AM »
The cheeky sod!!

I've just taken the pup out for her walk.

On my own.

When we got home, I closed the door and Mitzi wandered in here to have her harness taken off.

"That walk has tired us both out, hasn't it pup" says Steve, despite not walking her for several weeks!!

I give up!
Money talks, chocolate sings!  :-D

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Pip

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Re: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« Reply #2 on: July 07, 2018, 10:20:35 PM »
That's not on and I 'get it'.

When Rick finally succeeded in twisting my arm to get another dog after a two year break I said it was on the condition that he looked after the dog.  I feed Cassie usually and it's a miracle if he was he walks her on his own.  I'm not saying he never walks Cassie but it's either walking her or both together.  Even when it comes to taking her to the vets it's me who is always there but then again I'm the one who takes the cats to the vets.

However, we are carers for each other but even with that I'm the one who does most of the chores.  I've broken my ankle 6 years ago then had bad cellulitis for 8 weeks and was told both time not to put weight on my right leg.  What really happens?

I still did the cooking, washing laundry, hanging it out and the washing up most of the time.

Amanda_George

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Re: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« Reply #3 on: July 08, 2018, 09:01:16 AM »
Yup, Steve's the same.  Literally the only time he leaves his chair is to go to the bathroom or to his medical appointments!  The rest of the time he's just snoring away in his chair.  Apparently he's got a long meeting with his boss "early tomorrow morning" - the only time he works is when he's got a meeting like that with his boss on Skype, the rest of the time his laptop is turned off until literally a few hours before the meeting when he rushes it all through and constantly complains about it!

I'm Steve's carer too, but I'm not being paid for it and don't ask for anything in return but Steve's getting carers allowance for me but spending a maximum of half an hour a week caring for me!
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Amanda_George

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Re: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« Reply #4 on: July 08, 2018, 09:28:37 AM »
I've asked Steve for the last 3 weeks to help me clear up Mitzi's poo in the back yard.

His reply has always been "later".

I've just done it on my own so from now on I'll be using Steve's definition of "later" when he asks me to do something and I'll make "promises" that I don't keep too.

Bet it'll last hours before Steve throws a strop, yet I'll only be playing him at his own game that he's been playing for the last 3 weeks!

It's now 9.27am on Sunday 8th July... let's see how long it lasts before I use one of Steve's definitions for the first time!  lol
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Pip

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Re: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« Reply #5 on: July 09, 2018, 08:58:38 PM »
How long did it take?

Rick hates it when I use one of his lines  :stirthepot:

Amanda_George

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Re: Steve's supposed to be my carer, but...
« Reply #6 on: July 10, 2018, 10:02:31 AM »
I forgot to use it!  lol

He's got a medical appointment today though so I'll hopefully remember to use it when he gets back lol
Money talks, chocolate sings!  :-D

May your life be as pleasant as you are.