Over thinking

[Wigading]

Hi I'm new to this sort of thing, but I'm hoping someone can help me. I suffer with depression and ocd tendencies.

A few days ago I had a falling out with a work colleague. I won't go into the details as they are so silly.  Ever since the incident I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. It wasn't a falling out that didn't  happen face to face, it happened over email while I was away in Paris.

Ever since the whole thing has completely consumed me.  I'm really not bothered about the falling out particularly, as the woman involved is a bit of an idiot.  My point is that although I'm not particularly bothered about the falling out and the reasons behind it are ridiculous, I can't let go of it.  I'm fine if I'm busy, watching tv, chatting with friends etc, but as soon as I sit still it haunts me again.  I'm getting more and more frustrated by the hold it has over me.

Has anyone else had this problem or can suggest anyway in which I can try and let go.

Thanks

[Catbrian]

Yes, I have experience of similar.  The cause of your ruminating can come from any number of reasons.  In my case it might relate to my Personality Disorder, in your case it could relate to OCD.

Often situations like this have completely consumed me.  I have difficulty letting things go, in many ways I don't know how too.  Recently, someone wrote a quote on the Forum that helps me

"Letting go is not getting rid of, letting go is letting be"

I think it is harder to be on bad terms with people.  I have enough worries without being consumed by petty squabbles I may have with my peer's.  What would help me to draw a line under something like this would be a cool-headed confrontation, even if that is just to clear the air.  As soon as I made contact with the person, much of that obsessive irritation would disperse

[Sweetpea]

I can also sympathize with you, ever since I can remember I have fretted over arguments and like you I can't get them out of my mind. I also have mild ocd traits, maybe this is why we worry like we do, I just don't know.  But I just wanted you to know you are not alone.

S x x x x

[Wigading]

Thanks both. Shaz, it's good to know its not just and thank you for taking the time to post.

Cat, thanks for the advice. I'm sure when I go back to work tomorrow it will all be fine.  You're right that the issue needs to be addressed carefully, I just need to do it when i know ill be strong enough to cope with it should it get heated.  i think thats what scares me the most, getting upset over something silly. It's just the not knowing and over thinking the possible outcomes that are driving me mad. Hopefully, it will all turn out to be nothing tomorrow and I can get on with things.  Thanks to you as well for taking the time to reply.

X

[Pip]

Depending on my mood depends on whether I can 'let go' quickly.  Usually I let comments go over my head whether they are spoken or in emails but when I'm depressed I dwell on the comment(s).  Last week I was virtually in tears after a person having a dig because I had cleaned all the wood surfaces in the chapel (church).  Our minister had been in there with children from one of the local schools and had pretended to slip and the wood that is on the edge of the low platform as he has a wonderful sense of humour so did it to make the children laugh.  This person was there at the time and took it seriously so had a go at me as I told her I had cleaned it.  It was later I found out exactly what happened.

[Catbrian]

I understand it's not easy.  Life is difficult enough, eh?  I'm sure it will work out okay.  Hopefully, this time tomorrow, you'll feel a whole lot better.  Be strong and just remember one thing... she's "an idiot".  :bgrin:  Good luck.