It never goes away it just gets worse.

[Sallas]

Ive managed to stay away for awhile but after a bender ive hit rock bottom. Ive been having chest pains awhile and im too embarressed to get checked out, half of me thinks it would save alot of sadness if i go this way.
Im so lonely, ive nothing or no one to truly turn to and say help. Im screaming on the inside but no one cares. Ive been here before & ive come out of it but i just dont have the will or energy to fight. I need someone to hug me and say it will be ok, even if its a lie. I just need someone to like me.

[Zaf]

We care but the best we can do is cyber hugs and to listen  %^%

Z xxx

[Sallas]

Appreciated but not the same. The silence can become overwhelming. I hate myself, i dont blame other people for not caring. Ive done nothing wrong but people just dislike me. Last night a guy i barely know told me im a bitch, ive maybe talked to him 3 times in my life. What could i have possible done on him.
Alone, always alone.

[captainkeefy]

I'm so sorry you feel this way. I would feel really down too if I felt nobody cared. The thing is everyone on this board genuinely care about each and every person that comes here. I've not been here for a little while but when I was last here everyone really made me feel good enough to get myself the doctors and now I'm in Therapy and I feel so much better for it. I hope you stick around and join in and I promise that nobody here will dislike you.

[Ohdaddy]

I bet quite a few of us have been feeling like you at least a few times in our life.  I know when I feel depressed now because the self loathing starts and I feel like you.  Don't give into it - have you spoken to your GP or anybody else for help?

 PS -  *)*I could do with a hug too

[captainkeefy]

Sorry, I didn't realise that you have been here before. I thought that you were new to the forum, I still mean everything I wrote though!

[Sallas]

Thanks all. Im just venting. At least Christmas is next week & ill get some time off. Im scared tho about the time off. I do have family and they are great, they have their own problems though. I think as much as i hate being alone, im so used to it now its hard when people are around. I tell people how i feel and they say they would give anything to have no ties ect & to enjoy it. But id give anything for a partner, children ect
Im scared of being me. Alone & scared. Its not a great combination.

[stewart]

Hi Sallas  *()
being alons is indeed hell, and why that guy said what he did, im sure it didnt help you at all.

it is good you have a family that is great, and one hopes they understand your situation.
some people are happy to have no ties, so dont worry about what they say,
I can understand your fear of being alone, having a partner to share life with is a great thing.

[Catbrian]

I hope everything feels a little better today