Author Topic: Newbie looking for people who understand  (Read 13958 times)

EllaStar

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #30 on: October 31, 2012, 01:38:38 AM »
Thank you for all your advice :)

I will definitely make an appointment with the dr soon but might ask to see someone other than my usual family dr who has known me since I was a child!

Thank you for the symptoms, I have researched those a few times and made a list recently of my symptoms which are similar to those listed there. Mainly the ridiculous level of pessimism and loss of energy/feeling of helplessness jumps out at me but others like sleep problems and loss of appetite and self loathing are issues I have too.

Right now though I am thinking more clearly than I was earlier and talking to you has helped me tonight so thanks a lot :)

Ella

bookletters

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #31 on: October 31, 2012, 12:39:22 PM »
I am pleased to hear Ella!
Do ask to see a different doctor if you feel embarrassed. Most of us find depression is worse in the morning and lifts at night (something to do with circadian rythms). If you feel worse in the morning please don't be alarmed, it is totally normal!!!
Hope you have a good day xxx

Sweetpea

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #32 on: October 31, 2012, 08:22:11 PM »
Hope you get an appointment with a Dr. Maybe try writing a few things down on how you are feeling and take this with you. Take care. S x x x x

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bookletters

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #33 on: October 31, 2012, 09:30:08 PM »
Yes Shaz is right, or you could ask if you can fill in the PH-9 questionnaire for depression. Most GPs will ask you to anyway.

EllaStar

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #34 on: October 31, 2012, 10:13:20 PM »
Yes I will print off and fill in that form and take it with me when I actually build up the courage to make the first phone call!

Ella

Xxx

mat

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #35 on: October 31, 2012, 10:15:43 PM »
even when you make the phone call you don't need to say what your appointment is for, just imagine it as booking a regular appointment.

i know its easier said that done.
BEFORE YOU ACT, LISTEN
BEFORE YOU REACT, THINK
BEFORE YOU SPEND, EARN
BEFORE YOU CRITICIZE, WAIT
BEFORE YOU PRAY, FORGIVE

BEFORE YOU QUIT, TRY

bookletters

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #36 on: November 01, 2012, 12:30:05 AM »
Or, you can ask if there is a GP who deals specifically with anxiety and mental health. I have and I think they gave me more time + sent me to a GP more specialized in that sort of problems.
My friend's friend used to self harmed so badly she had to have the nurse change her bandages every week + her self harm got so bad she ended up in hospital needing blood transfusion or she was going to die. GPs see cases like that all the time Ella, so sorry if I sound dismissive (I am not) but us and our depression we're really nothing new under the sun to them.... your GP will be listening to you and ask questions about your symptoms and tell you the best course of action. They will not be thinking any less of you and it's nothing to be embarrassed about (that's depression making you/us feel like that). I get on really well with my CBT therapist and she was telling me that one of her clients is a GP and another one is a dentist.... so really, depression can happen to just anybody, it's a malfunction of the limbic system and it's nothing to get embarrassed about. Will be thinking of you when you go to the docs xxx

EllaStar

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #37 on: November 01, 2012, 12:32:22 AM »
I think they do ask what it is for at my doctors :S I know you don't have to say but the whole idea is just horrible. I've been willing to go through all the stress and heart ache rather than just go and ask for help because the idea is too horrid lol I know I need to get a grip.

Ella
 
xxx

bookletters

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #38 on: November 01, 2012, 12:37:13 AM »
If they ask what it's for.... just say it's confidential or say it's for a physical problem that you need to show the doc for a diagnosis!!!
My surgery never ask what it's for thank goodness, I would hate that!

EllaStar

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand l
« Reply #39 on: November 01, 2012, 01:31:50 AM »
Sorry bookletters, I didn't see your other comment. I don't think you're being dismissive. I feel really suicidal right now :( Watching best friend with her fiancée, so happy and in love. I think happiness like that is within my grasp, so what is the point in anything?

bookletters

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #40 on: November 01, 2012, 03:33:20 PM »
Ella, it's the depression making you think / feel like this. Morning often tend to be worse too.
Please, please phone your doc and book an appointment. You don't have to suffer, feel suicidal and low about the future. Please, please see your doc, pick up the phone girl!!!!
Would be lovely to hear you've done it. Come on Ella!!! xxx

EllaStar

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #41 on: November 01, 2012, 03:54:45 PM »
I had an ultimate low last night :( it was awful. Luckily I called a good friend and they sorted me out and stopped me from hurting myself but I was just an absolute state. I will go and make an appointment tomorrow, promise :)

bookletters

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #42 on: November 01, 2012, 04:31:04 PM »
Ella, do it today please or go to accident and emergency if your surgery is not open and tell them you are worried you are going to hurt youself so they can give you a prescription pronto presto !!!!
Seriously, it is very likely to become tougher and tougher if you don't start on medication me thinks.
From experience: when you are on the right medication, your lows will because a lot more tolerable and gradually you will go back to your happy / relaxed self.
Please don't delay....

Catbrian

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #43 on: November 01, 2012, 05:11:24 PM »
Hi Ella.  Sorry, I've not been on the Forum much this past couple of weeks, but I've just been reading through your pages, since I last posted.

I'm so sorry to read of the difficult times you are having.  I couldn't say any more than has already been said.  I can totally understand any feelings of rejection you might have since your B/F left you for another woman.  Let me tell you, Ella (from an old wise man!)  not only is he an idiot, he's a cheat and a liar and someone you are best shot of.  I think all women in their 20's must go through self-doubt whenever they are not in relationships.  Maybe it's a lot to do with the "Biological clock" ticking.  My sister always felt like you do throughout her 20's.  She eventually married at 32 and subsequently had her two boys, who are now 17 and 19, and, yes, she is still with her husband.  One day, you too will meet Mr Right.  Until then, try not to evaluate yourself or your situation while you're so depressed.  We all seem to have such a pessimistic view of ourselves when we're at our worst.

I don't know whether you need medication, but I certainly think it would help if you could talk everything over with your GP.  I remember the first time I approached anyone about depression, I was in my late 20's and felt very self-conscious.  Maybe I might have felt more awkward if I was using the same GP since childhood, but in many ways, maybe his knowledge of you and your background might help him support you as best he/she can.  I always take a list to the GP, I think he almost expects it.  I imagine I'm not the first highly-emotional patient he's seen with a list in their hand.

What worries me the most for you, is that your lows will gradually become lower and with it an increasing isolation.  We are similar in that we both feel a certain amount of shame and maybe even embarrassment, about our depression and I think I keep my depression as much a secret as you do.  It appears to me that you have a lot of thoughts about self-harm and left unchecked, my concern is that, one very low day, you might just carry out what is currently just a fantasy.

Ella, your health is too important, your life precious, NOt to take our advice and go see your GP.  Everyone who has written on these pages have urged you to make an appointment.  If Reception ask what you're making the appointment for, just say "personal reasons".  You mentioned that you called a friend last night, who was a big help.  Maybe you could explain the situation to them and ask if they will accompany you to the GP.  Honestly, you'll find as soon as you're sat in front of the GP, all you'll need to say is "I am very depressed".  The GP won't expect you to talk your own way through it, they will lead the way forward, I promise you.

I'm pleased to see you've been posting regularly.  The Forum is one of the best places for support and advice that you'll ever find.

Please take care, Cat

 

EllaStar

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Re: Newbie looking for people who understand
« Reply #44 on: November 01, 2012, 11:22:15 PM »
Is it normal to have like a period of depression where it is quite intense for a few days/weeks? I have really tried today to keep busy and keep positive after last night's episode and I have seeing my friend from uni who I havent seen for months tomorrow to look forward to, but I just can't feel positive. I feel like I might burst into tears at any point and I have this constant nervous feeling in my stomach that I can't shake off. I don't understand why I can't just feel normal and content when it's been an average day and I've got positive things planned? Feeling very frustrated!

For the first time, I am thinking that I might ask about anti depressants. I was really against the idea but as many of you have said, what is the point in struggling when I could do something about it?

Ella

Xxx