Hello from Canada. Long term survivor here!

[Rumple]

    I am a 55 yr. old artist/musician who is still fighting this major depressive illness. I think I just feel too much.  I help people out and get betrayal in exchange and it makes me wary of expressing my emotions. I'm sick of the dog eat dog "competitive" culture that we live in.  I have a lot to offer, yet I'm not pushy about it so I get steamrollered by loudmouths with no talent. Care to talk anyone?

[Sweetpea]

Hello and I totally understand what you said. S x x x x

[Zaf]

Hi and welcome Rumple  *()

Ive been fighting it for years too

Z xx

[Dianosaur]

It's been a long time for me too (15yrs) and it can be so exhausting.

[Zaf]

its been 12 years for me and its a horrible illness

Z xx

[Sweetpea]

Been 8 years for me   S x x x x

[Catbrian]

Hi rumple.... a big welcome to you.

I'm 20yrs with depression secondary to Post Traumatic Stress and it's a 'tough old bird to swallow'

True what you say about being trampled on in exchange for our kindness.  We have a saying in Glasgow (Scotland), where I'm from.... ''Don't take my 'saftness' for daftness''... being from canada, you may not get that one.

Hope you find the Forum supportive

Cat

[KateG]

Hi and welcome

Kate x

[Ezel]

Hi and welcome  *() ~ I'm sufferer of depression of about 36 / 37 years.

[sample4444]

Hi I'm new here as well and everyone's been really kind :) when you say people always betray you, maybe it could be an idea to make a few new friends in a completely new circle of people? are there any art clubs or bands local to you?

[Buttercup]

Hi and welcome. It's been 21 years for me on and off. Xxx

[Rumple]

   I want to thank everyone who replied to my post and apologise for not replying sooner. Everyone on here seems so kind and supportive. I really didn't expect anything, and that is why I have not been on this site since posting. I was wrong and so plan to visit and post regularly. At my age, one has to wonder if this cursed disease ever goes away. I'm having such a hard time having any motivation,and moving forward in my life. I have been on anti depressants for years,and while they seem to help initially, the effect quickly wears off. The latest is a drug called effexor which was prescribed in high doses that left me addicted and struggling to get off of the stuff. I've cut way down on my dosage, but every time I try to stop completely, I get very sick and ache all over. Anyone else have experience with this?

[Zaf]

Sorry Rumple I've no experience of it

Z xx

[Catbrian]

Welcome back Rumple… I’m pleased you have experience of this Forum’s friendliness and support.

I’ve never heard of Effexor.  But, I do have experience of a Diazepam (valium) addiction, so can appreciate your difficulty.  What about speaking to your Doc about a Mood Stabiliser?  Initially prescribed as anti-psychotic medication.  Given in lower doses, it’s known to help lift and stabilise the mood.  I think every drug, even anti-depressants, carry various degree’s of addiction. 

[KateG]

Not had any experience of that one, I think we call it venlafaxine in the UK