I want to believe

[Ally]

I think that I want to return to religion, but I have issues....
Over the past year, I have been thinking more and more about God and religion. I know that faith brings people comfort and can help them through dark times.

The problem I have is that my mum died when I was 3 and my 2 brothers were younger than me (1 and the other a few months old)
I remember pretty much everything that happened that day. I was raised catholic and everyone has told me that God chose her for a reason and taken her to a better place.
The question I have is what better place is there for a mother to be than with her children? Especially with them being so young.

I have never wanted to talk to anyone, i.e. a priest, about my concerns as I am scared that I might talk them out of their faith and beliefs! That is not something that I would want to be responsible for.

The other problem is that, 5 or 6 years ago, I was going through a rough time (mainly recently diagnosed with depression, partner lied to me about being pregnant) I went to a church service and when they were reading from the bible, all I could think was that they were contridicting each other, both in the sermon and the scripture. If they can't even agree with what they say in their holy text, then what hope is there for me who is looking at renewing their faith!

I am not going to just jump into this again. I will have to do a bit more research before I decide what I am going to do.

A.
xx

[Zaf]

I think it would be incredibly unlikely that you would cause a priest to doubt hIs faith Ally and it could possibly help you to talk to one if you decide to stick with your current faith.

My faith teaches that everything happens for a reason but unfortunately we rarely know the reasons and must accept thats our destiny and deal with it best we can

What parts of the bible do you find contradict themselves?

[Ally]

Hey Zaf.
I can't remember what parts, but when I was listening to the readings, I couldn't help but hear the contradictions.

I am going to get myself a bible and read it as I might have been hearing it out of context.

Will keep you posted  :)

[Zaf]

That sounds a good idea :)

[Stu62]

I used to be very religious. I was even considering ordination but then I started to find it harded and harder to reconcile the stuff I was going through with depression with what I heard in church. So I stopped believing. In some ways this makes life much less complicated, I'm not looking for deeper meanings in things, I don't have to wonder why God lets bad things happen. I do miss the social life that church gave me and try and keep in touch with friends that I made there. They understand where I'm at and aren't judgemental, at least most of them aren't.
On the other hand I often wish that there was a God - then I could hope that there was a deeper purpose for all the bad stuff that happens to me.
The funny thing is the Bible does actually explore emotions and experiences that seem very much like depression. Have a look at Psalm 13, for example.

[Zaf]

I opted out of Christianity in my teens and after exploring many religions, faiths and beliefs eventually found one that answered all my questions and most of my doubts about 4 years ago (in my early 50's), perhaps if you are unhappy with your current faith its time to explore other christian religions or even different faiths entirely?

[Luna]

I once did some kind of online test to see if I came from a background likely to cause a predisposition to depression (or something like that)  One of the questions was 'Were you brought up as a Roman Catholic, or in the Jewish Faith?'  I ticked the catholic box.  Someone I know went to an AA meeting and instead of saying 'I'm x and I'm an alcoholic,' they said 'I'm x and I am a catholic.' Everyone laughed, because half the people in the room were catholic.  I don't wish to make light- i too hanker after some kind of spiritual connection but the guilt that comes along with catholicism in my view really can be oppressive and depressive.  Recently I heard a programme on Radio 4 about the hymn 'Dear Lord and Father Of Mankind.' I always loved that hymn, and the words 'O still small voice of calm' sum up what my sense of god is today- something, somewhere, deep inside of me, where I know how to care for myself and others. Hard to access, but there nonetheless if I pay attention.  One thing catholicism has given to me is a real interest in spiritual matters, which is a gift, I believe.  All the best x

[Terino00]

I was an atheist for a number of years.
I suffered from depression for a number of years.
I fell in love.
I started going to Church.
I was baptised into the Catholic Faith.
Does this mean I don't find contradictions in the bible any more? No it doesn't.
Does it mean I will never have depression again? Well I hope so but you never know.

Lord, I believe.
Help thou my unbelief!