I'm new to the site and I see on here a lot of talk about suicide/ wishing for death and self harm.
You've probably seen from my 'introduction post' that I've been through the mill myself and mentioned the thoughts of suicide.
I can't give any insight on self harm though, as I have never been there or thought about it myself.
But...
One thing I'd like to put on the site, is why I didn't carry out my thoughts on suicide.
When I lost my kids, I had nothing to keep me going.
All I had was an ugly fight against Social Services. Which made me worse.
So I used what I call 'Logical Thinking'.
I came up with a few points by thinking about my life in a logical way, here's just two of them:
"What would happen to my girls if I buggered off to the Afterlife and left them without someone to fight for their safety? I will not LET them beat ME."
"I have nobody outside the family to socialise with. I'm all alone. F@ck it, I'm going to take up playing pool again, like the old days. I've got time to play, my kids are elsewhere now."
You know where I am now in my life?
My kids are safe, I see them whenever I like.
I have managed to get good enough at pool to play for the County and at World Standard (I entered the Masters about a year ago).
All this, from Thinking Logically about my actions and inactions.
Maybe my post here doesn't mean much, I don't know, I just really hope and wish that it does give whoever reads it a sense of "Oh yeah, I could try that.".
It worked for me.
Think logically.
I end this particular post with something my Mother told me:
"If in doubt, throw it out"
SSF
