Sorry but I need to rant, I don't care if anyone reads this or replies I just need to vent. I am sat here crying my eyes out like a moron. The last few days have done so well, we have had a family friends dog over to stay with us and taking him for walks and stuff has gotten me out of the house and he's kept me company, but he went home today. I know it's silly that a dog going away can make me feel bad but it's other stuff too. I'm still off work sick with depression and over the past few days I have had to deal with my boss telling me that she will not be paying me sick pay because I'm an apprentice and don't earn enough and that I have to go through the job centre, which I don't mind but it would have been much more helpful if she had told me that three weeks ago, rather than leaving my sick notes sitting on her desk and not telling me until I questioned why I had not been paid. I'm recently out of a long term relationship, my first of that kind and the loneliness is hurting, but I think that being away from him is a good thing, I have realised that he was poisonous. I just don't know what to do, nobody talks to me unless I talk to them first, nobody checks if I'm ok. The tip of the iceberg, something so minor, my mum asked me what I wanted for dinner and I told her that I wasnt hungry and that I'd sort it later. She said ok, twenty minutes later she comes in and tells me that she has plated up some pasta that she made especially for me, I told her that I still wasn't hungry and that I hadn't been lying when I had said that. She proceeded to have a go at me because she'd made four separate meals for the family...I hadn't asked her too. For some reason it just set me off, I burst out crying, I've cut myself a bit to just release it. It's like I feel like I'm going to explode and I need a physical action.
