work related issues

[stac23]

having some issues with work, I'm a customer advisor in a grocery store, a very customer facing role, my depression and anxiety is starting to affect me in work, I'm finding it increasingly difficult facing the general public and Manding the tills,  most shifts I would be standing at tills serving for up to 4 hours at a time, I get very anxious and stressed when in this situation, management are not understanding at all, just throw it in my face that it's my job as a customer advisor to serve on tills and it's ridiculous that I can't handle 4 hours on them, I'm currently off sick for few weeks due to my depression and anxiety but I'm getting increasingly worried about returning, they have referred me to occupational health doctor, have tryed talking to management about "reasonable adjustments" to make my working life more easier as I am classed as having a disability, I was basically told that there isn't any non customer facing roles in the store and they can't let me do important tasks which most staff do as they feel my head isn't in it and I can't concentrate and may mess things up, don't know what to do anymore I feel there's a bit of discrimination there and deffinately no understanding of my illness, I think they feel I'm bringing it all on myself and making things out worse than they are or that I'm just lazy and don't wana do till work, it's kinda ironic that the store managers husband has a history of depression, however she is still cold and non sympathetic and has the attitude of "I'm trying to run a shop I don't need this hassle" have been in contact with labour relations and the equality commission they recommend I put in a grievance but citizens advice recommended I wait until I see the doc, anyone any advice or help they can give me? my company has a head office and warehouse that I would love to move positions to as it is a non customer facing role but is it possible to ask for this or will they tell me where to go? it's all really getting down and making my depression worse iv even been feeling sucideal and worthless lately and taking so much time off work is causing me to struggle financially and I get really fed up, but If I was back in work I'd get worse so I feel I can't win, is there an organisation that will be on my side and help guide me in the right direction? anyone I talk to on the phone either don't seem to know what they are talking about or are telling me many different things and I don't know what's right to do, any advice greatly appreciated as I'm at my wits end   

[craig84]

hi stac23

Im not sure how long you have suffered with depression or if this is as bad as it has ever got for you but I hope I can help somehow.

so with regards to work id say get a copy of your contract and have a look at your grievance policy if you haven't already done so. It should state in there what procedures are in place with regards to their policy and having a better understanding of that will help you feel less anxious about not knowing what will happen. usually the bigger the company the more they adhere to policy and doing things the right way. ive worked for a few what I call "cowboy" companies before which would do things like make your job harder so you would quit because they couldn't fire you, or who aren't sensitive to what illness you have. we live in an age where its not acceptable to be judgemental because of and illness or disability so they are in the wrong if they are not supporting you any way they can. especially if you have been there for a few years.

thinking about equality and diversity, for them not to let you do other jobs in the site where you are because they are deemed "too important" and you might mess them up isn't right. especially if other staff are doing those things! (i'd say join a union if its getting to the point where your not sure what your rights are or the right way of doing things because they can act as an advocate on your behalf. which will help when your depressed because we all want someone fighting our corner when were low)

best bit of advice is to study... google coping strategies for anxiety for the short term fix and try do adapt your own ways of coping in that situation. everybody is different so you can feed off of other experiences and manipulate them to work best for you! I have been in that situation before where I had to stop working because of my depression, not being able to face people and the anxiety of that making it harder for me to do my job, I was in management for nationwide retailers but I had a breakdown and I never went back. im out of work now because of my depression and im trying to learn how to deal with it so I can try and get on with my life.

i used to live in hotels but  now I live between family so I don't have to worry about rent or anything but I want to get my independence back and hold a job again. what you said about not feeling like you can win regardless I completely relate to! you have to persevere and fight for yourself though so don't give up !

my ways of dealing with anxiety is more bravery than anything and I jump in with both feet. thats not my advice to you its just how I deal with things, before I get too anxious about something im already doing it so its usually not as bad as I first thought.  i couldn't deal with people looking at me all the time though i still barely look people in the eyes when i speak to them.

i used to be with a mental health charity called mind which helped me a lot with counselling and groups on building confidence and dealing with anxiety maybe there is something like that in your area?

[Pip]

Is there a union where you work?  If there is they may be able to help you as well.  It may also be worth you making an appointment with the disability work adviser at your nearest Job Centre.  He or she may be able to give you advice as well as companies aren't supposed to discriminate against their employees.

[Steed66]

I have suffered from similar problems at work, I've hardly ever had a day off in the last 10 yrs  with my depression, i manage to get in every day even at 6am start when I've hardly slept, but because i don't want to work overtime, I've been moved from different sections and finally i got moved off my department altogether. I've felt bullied and pressured and the whole management are not even sympathetic to anything about my situation. Its basically, do what we want and they say if you don't like it... then leave.
Having these kinds of threats and comments doesn't really help, i have problems with my marriage and wife at home and then i get problems at work.
Even the hr department are practically useless, they won't help if it means making waves with their manager.