Depression Forums
General => The Lounge => Topic started by: sad sack on June 13, 2012, 10:43:25 PM
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anyone else just feel like a good cry sometimes...
I haven't cried for years... in fact I can't remember the last time I actually did... I just feel like it sometimes...for some reason I think it would help 'clear the air' or something equally daft...
my eyes do well up at films sometimes... but no real tears...
none... no joy, pain... nothing....
>:D
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I have days when i want to cry but can't and others when i can't stop.
xxx
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I have to admit I cry at the drop of a hat, always been the same. I think crying helps.
S x x x x
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lol...
but you need to remember, well you probably don't know, I forgot I was new around here...
I am a male, from Glasgow in Scotland.... we are not allowed to cry... people get hurt for that kind of thing growing up around here!!! lol
we get pre programmed to be 'hard' and not to show any emotion... I'm guessing now it works!!! £*$
>:D
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I get that, i have some big glaswegian cousins (my mums actually). I can understand the accent up to a point, 3am on new years eve/day is where I lose it ;)
Been to the Gorbals a few times as well.
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OMG sorry forgot you were a guy ;). Everyone should cry when they need to. Its sad that men are not supposed to cry.
S x x x x
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no one ever needs to go to the gorbals buttercup!!!! lol :-p
yeah it's strange Shaz... just not the done thing for a male eh....
don't get me wrong, I don't want to burst into tears when I stub my toe or anything... but a good proper cry now and again must be good for you... eh!?!?!?!?
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I think its really sad that boys are brought up not to cry, a good cry when I'm feeling really down does make me feel better, sort of releases a tension.
Lol, it was the high rise tower blocks as well, that dates it a bit ;) Think I had my first taste of Iron Bru there and Square sausage. (Couldn't get either in Devon at the time)
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Its silly really we are all human and have feelings - whether they be good or bad feelings. We all should be able to feel free to cry.
S x x x x
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Agree with you there Shaz
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lol IRN BRU and Lorne sausage!!
I agree about the crying... just don't know why I can't... maybe some block emotionally somewhere or something...
odd...
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Lol just realised the spelling mistake, changed it to square. ;) My mum would shoot me, she's Glaswegian
I think if you're told that something isn't the done thing on a frequent basis it becomes ingrained into your psyche and therefore a block, stiff upper lip and all that. I also wonder if depression can make some people numb that sense.
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Lol just realised the spelling mistake, changed it to square. ;) My mum would shoot me, she's Glaswegian
I think if you're told that something isn't the done thing on a frequent basis it becomes ingrained into your psyche and therefore a block, stiff upper lip and all that. I also wonder if depression can make some people numb that sense.
LOL... good girl.... always a square sausage... and brown sause ;) ;) ;)
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I found sertraline prevented me from crying. I still felt sad but I couldn't quite FEEL it if that makes sense.
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hi sad sack
personally i find sometimes i get overwhelmed and i'm in floods of tears i don't think it's a bad thing anymore but before i entered therapy i was emotionally dead and thats because i was brought up not to show emotions and it certainly has had a long term effect on me however eventhough sometimes it's a little hard to control i'm getting there and i do feel sometimes that a weight has been lifted (to coin a cliche)
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Hi sad sack....I am a Glaswegian living in London and I haven't cried for 20yrs....until just recently. I wept - only once - at the sad realisation of just how mental life had become!
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I have always cried at life, tv programmes, books, films, you name it, if it is the slightest bit emotional then I cry.
Having depression just means that I cry at more things now.
I should have bought shares in waterproof mascara.....
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found an old film sets me off if its all feelings stuck inside and not cried as this film helps relase , ET, AI films that set me off and are used to help let it all out , altho do cry when at worse sometimes need to and its stuck and fims help as memories from past and the film set in.
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Hi sad sack, I never used to cry at anything. For my first four years in secondary school I never cried once, not even at home. Then when things started to go wrong I have cried at school most days. I know how frustrating it is to not be able to cry, whether its because you just can't seem to or you can't because of 'image'. I think that everyone needs to cry no matter who they are xx
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I used to cry a lot as a kid but I think I had it knocked out of me (metaphorically), I wish I could just cry like I once did. Now my crying is less conscious, sometimes I feel tears falling (like the memorable part in Philip K Dick's 'Flow My Tears The Policeman Said'). Sometimes my face contracts but very little comes out.
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That is exactly what I experience. Good topic!
I always had moods and for a female a week before the monthly period, it used to be easy to just cry
and let emotions run.
For 3 years now, I am stiff and my face is hardly moving. When I look in the mirror, I want to cry and sometimes I just start, but the desperation COMES FROM THE HEAD and not FROM THE HEART.
The last time I really desperately cried was when I watched the film 'Message in a bottle' with Kevin Costner and Robin Wright Penn. I had not been on anti-depressants and well enough for months and when I watched the film, I felt this strong PMT and while the story was going I could not detatch myself from the loss this character was going through. I desperatly wanted him to feel better and get over his loss and then he died.
I didn't want him to die.
As if something in me totally identified with this loss.
Now I am back on Anti-depressants again since May and still feel terrible. *^*
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Well, not sure what's changed with me.... but with everything going on, I've had a good few cries...
Doesn't make me feel much better, maybe I'm not very "good" at it... but had some tears...
Not sure why i felt the need to share that... but there you go! :lol:
%$£ %$£ %$£
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I wish I could cry more often. I also can have a serious looking hardened expressionless face. People have often told me to cheer up, even when I am happy!!
Sad sack.... it's good to hear from you again.
Cinderella... I'm sure you already know that certain anti-depressants don't work for some people. Perhaps you could try another kind? Sometimes we need to try a few before eventually finding one that helps. A long road, I'm afraid. Good luck
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I wish I could cry more often. I also can have a serious looking hardened expressionless face. People have often told me to cheer up, even when I am happy!!
Sad sack.... it's good to hear from you again.
Cinderella... I'm sure you already know that certain anti-depressants don't work for some people. Perhaps you could try another kind? Sometimes we need to try a few before eventually finding one that helps. A long road, I'm afraid. Good luck
Thank you Catb. It is a very hard and long road and incredibly frightening. :-\
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I want to cry and sometimes I just start, but the desperation COMES FROM THE HEAD and not FROM THE HEART.
^^Thats excactly how i feel. Im still only an early teen yet, right now more than anything i just wish i could cry! Every time i slightly well up, suddenly its my mind whos urging me to carry on, but the moment ALWAYS passes. Im 13, i havent cried properly in two years. When my pets died, there would be my mum in tears and all i could do was act sad. its like i dont have the ability to anymore, its really weird, ever since the depression. But i have been brought up to let out emotions and it wasnt weird to cry in my family? maybe its just because for soo long ive had to take a role as an adult to help and support my family and brother whos ill, its like i cant show sadness in my own home anymore, maybe ive just become so withdrawn i cant cry anymore?
i dont know, guess it could be quite a few reasons.
I hope that if ou feel like crying, that one day you can :)
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@ CatandMouse
I guess that is part of the depression and if you feel that you are taking on your parents and brother's problems, then that can create stress.
My daughter is your age and I always say to her that when you are a teenager you are constantly growing and learning new things every day, so that is extra added pressure.
What really helps is to chat to friends, that is what I did when I was growing up and I think my daughter finds a lot of comfort in her friends, too.
Its good to share these feelings here, too. Thanks for sharing! :D
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Cat and Mouse... I totally agree with what Cinderella has written. It's so important to have support. You should take credit for the strength and maturity you display in such a selfless approach to the issues at home.
Sometimes when we're going through a rough patch, there is little room left for the worries and upset of things around us. This is probably why you feel numb of emotions. Personally, I have experience of similar emotional numbness but know it is directly linked to my depression.
Cinderella... I love the avatar. I agree, when we're suffering depression, it is a 'long and frightening road'. I hope things are beginning to pick up... We are all here to support you anytime
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thank you Cat B. It helps to know that one is not the only one.
Love your 'eating, sleeping, roaring cat/or tiger?
lol
;)
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Something I have done ..............
I am amazed to say.. But then I never thought in My worse dreams a few tears ago that I could feel how I do at those low moments..
Ant
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Hi. My parents have always been great to me. I'm lucky - I'm 54 and they are still alive. But they just never have understood crying. I remember when my father's Mum was buried. Standing near the grave he looked lost, I was crying so I tried to give him a hug, but he avoided me, backed off and put his hand out to shake my hand! (So, once again I make it all about me!) Crying can help with so much, when the time is right. Man, woman or child, all need to cry at times. Overmedication blocks it for me some times, so I stop the meds for a while, but then when I find I'm crying too much and at silly things I start the meds again. I shouldn't do this I know, but I need to feel that I CAN feel.
I would never advise anyone to stop medication but it seems to keep me...sane? Does this make sense?
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Hi. My parents have always been great to me. I'm lucky - I'm 54 and they are still alive. But they just never have understood crying. I remember when my father's Mum was buried. Standing near the grave he looked lost, I was crying so I tried to give him a hug, but he avoided me, backed off and put his hand out to shake my hand! (So, once again I make it all about me!) Crying can help with so much, when the time is right. Man, woman or child, all need to cry at times. Overmedication blocks it for me some times, so I stop the meds for a while, but then when I find I'm crying too much and at silly things I start the meds again. I shouldn't do this I know, but I need to feel that I CAN feel.
I would never advise anyone to stop medication but it seems to keep me...sane? Does this make sense?
I know what you mean. I think that parents get shocked when their own child shows emoation in a very vulnerable moment. I had a moment like that with my father, too and won't forget how frightened he looked, when I offered my help, a hug and comfort.
I sometimes wonder about how it feels when my own children do that and don't ever want to push them away.
I also agree with you when it comes to medication. It is the most confusing thing. Life with depression is confusing, and the role of medication even more..... what it does to the body..... the different opinions people have on it..... etc. I guess it is so, because the body, soul is a very unique creation and it is never totally straight forward.
I too have been on medication now for 3 1/2 months and really totally confused about its effect. Keep reading that only 40 - 50 % of people taking Antidepressants really benefit from it and 20 - 30% don't see a difference. %$£
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Thanks very much for hearing me Cinderella.
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lol...
but you need to remember, well you probably don't know, I forgot I was new around here...
I am a male, from Glasgow in Scotland.... we are not allowed to cry... people get hurt for that kind of thing growing up around here!!! lol
we get pre programmed to be 'hard' and not to show any emotion... I'm guessing now it works!!! £*$
>:D
I'm not from Glasgow, but it's the same in Liverpool, boys/men don't cry, it's a sign of weakness, you MUST be tough.
This is what we live up to for some daft reason!!!
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lol...
but you need to remember, well you probably don't know, I forgot I was new around here...
I am a male, from Glasgow in Scotland.... we are not allowed to cry... people get hurt for that kind of thing growing up around here!!! lol
we get pre programmed to be 'hard' and not to show any emotion... I'm guessing now it works!!! £*$
>:D
I'm not from Glasgow, but it's the same in Liverpool, boys/men don't cry, it's a sign of weakness, you MUST be tough.
This is what we live up to for some daft reason!!!
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I guess, whether it is being a boy or a girl, the fear is that ONE WOULD NEVER STOP CRYING once you start and that idea makes you not cry at all, which is just as bad.
I have had (and I am female) times I can remember, where I was drawn into this sea of emotion, full of sadness, but it is pretty illogical, because at some point I did make my way out of this intense sadness.
I think it is the intensity we fear, when we avoid to cry.
With boys and crying, I can say that my son cries and so does my husband, although he can only manage that when he had a few to drink.
There is this episode in the friends sitcom, when Ross is confronted with his male babysitter. Rachel can very easily deal with a man looking after her baby daughter, but Ross is highly competitive and later admits to the male babysitter that his father did not show him enough love.
We expect men to be tough and if you are not tough all the time, then critizism is an easy solution. Not to forget the soldiers fighting in warzones. Imagine they would cry everytime they had to attack or kill their enemy? It wouldn't work. This is why there are so many soldiers, who now openly say that war is hell and when they come back from serving as a soldier are pretty traumatised by it.
But I think emotions are generally feared, whether you are a man or a woman.
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My dad doesn't show his emotions but he can't stand it if I cry as he feels he should protect me and keep me safe from the negative side of life.