Can someone please help me?

[Keren]

Thanks Kate, it does help a lot. I'm feeling bad at the moment, I feel like I could just cry forever, I wish I could see an end to this..  I'm going try and read the posts on depression, I haven't liked to do that yet

[SteveW]

I’m not actually Steve Wellam, I’m a female friend staying with him but I thought I would reply to you. At some point I think you are going to have to bite the bullet and seek counselling. If it helps in any way you would be ideally suited to one of the Women’s Therapy Centres. I know of 4 towns where they exist, Bristol, Leeds, Glasgow, and London, where there are several. Because you have been indirectly affected by Rape, one of the Rape Crisis Centres might be prepared to help you. There are a lot more of those. The link below has a telephone number you can ring to find out the one that is closest to you.
  http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/centres.php

I’d like to hope that you’ll recover on your own, but it really is so much easier if you have help.

[Keren]

Please dont say that.. I cant think of it.  I picked up the phone today to try and make an appointment with the doctors because i felt so bad but i just couldnt do it.  I'm not going to be able to. I think I had a panic attack or something, my chest feels tight and my throat. Im in such a mess right now and my husband is coming home. i have to be normal and ive been in tears since i tried to ring. Im really scared at the moment  I dont want to think about doctors , im sorry if i sound ungrateful, Im just in a mess at the moment

[Keren]

If you want i can stop coming on here, if its not helpful for other people if they see im frightened of doctors,, i know i sound like Im not listening, i am, but Im really frightened

[Sweetpea]

Please keep posting, we do understand and we will be here to support you.  You can only get medical help when you are ready to do so.

S x x

[Keren]

sorry i panic so much at the thought of it. I did try. That was a few hours ago and Im still feeling ill..  my hands are shaking so much. I dont think I'll be able to do it.  Im really scared of whats going to happen to me but i think id rather not be here than see anyone right now

[KateG]

Please keep posting Keren. Only get professional help when you're ready to do so. In the meantime, we're here to listen and will help as much as we can

Thinking of you xx

[Zaf]

Do keep posting, we will help as much as we are able

Z xx

[Keren]

Hi.. I really don't want to stop coming on here, you've helped me so much with your support. I feel so down, I'm really feeling sad.  I don't really know what to do, I'm so confused that I'm feeling like this. I feel so alone at the moment, more than I've ever done. I'm sorry, but I can't think of seeing a doctor or anyone

[Zaf]

Do you think phoning the samaritans might help a bit?

Z xx

[Keren]

I did think about it the other day.. I know you're going to think I'm so stupid but my past has left me so messed up. I seem to be scared of everything! I'm scared of breaking down in front of someone or even on the phone. I was made to feel so ashamed of crying or showing my feelings. I've managed for so long to get by, I thought I'd always be alright, but now this has happened and I'm lost..  I also don't want my husband knowing. He would treat me like I wasn't normal (and he'd be right I suppose!)  This is the most I feel I can do

[Zaf]

I certainly dont think you're stupid, the samaritans wouldnt tell your husband and are used to listening to people who are emotional,  i think if you look at their site you can email them, that might be worth considering

Z xx

[Keren]

I'll have a look. If I rang it would show up on phone bills, which he sees.  I could maybe email them, but I don't know if I'd be able to keep doing that. I don't know if that's something they do...  I'm really sorry I sound so negative all the time..I know I have to try something but I just want to hide away..

[Zaf]

When I was first depressed there was definitely one or two places you could email, I'm sure samaritans were one of them

Z xx

[KateG]

Yes, you can email the Samaritans if that's easier. I think you can email Mind too?

Take care and keep posting &*(